Be myself

I’m trying to get braver about admitting to the things I like or dislike in front of other people even if I think they won’t agree with me. I was talking to an old friend from high school the other day. I told her about a class I was talking that I was afraid she might think was weird or stupid. But, I decided I really liked my class and she asked what I had done that day. That was the highlight of my day and I wanted to share it. If she doesn’t like the things I’m interested or thinks they are dumb or doesn’t want to be my friend because of it then I can probably find some better friends. She didn’t say too much when I told her but she is still my friend so I guess it wasn’t a total bust! : )

I just realized how much this is related to me being a people pleaser. I can’t be myself when I’m trying to be a people pleaser all the time! Most of the time pleasing others means not being myself.

I am really proud of myself because today at work I expressed an unpopular opinion with someone I really respect. That was hard but my opinion is valid!

I have to keep reminding myself that if I am myself I will attract friends who are like me. I met this guy this summer who is really nice and we have a lot in common. I haven’t heard from him in a long time. I’m pretty sure that it’s because he doesn’t like some of my friends. I feel sort of bad about this. It’s that people pleaser in me who wants everyone to like me. I’m trying to remind myself that if he doesn’t like my friends then he is probably not someone I want to hang out with anyway. But, part of me feels like I should try to present another side of myself to him so he will want to hang out with me but that is not the real me and I’m trying to shake the image of the person he would probably like me to be. I have to remember to just be myself.

Work is the hardest. I work in a job where I feel like I completely have to create a fake persona. I’m starting to think I may never be able to 100% achieve this goal working where I do.

I think I am getting better at this and making small steps at being myself and not caring about what other people think. I still worry too much about whether or not other people will agree with me though. I think it will be easier to be myself when I like myself more.

I’m slowly coming to the realization that if I am myself I will attract friends who I really like because they are more like me. I think in the past I have tended to attract people in my life who are not the best for me because they were not attracted to the real me.

I long for friends I can be myself around 100%. I have a few but I would like to lose some of my others and have more friends that would make this goal easier!

I really don’t care anymore. So many people in my life have disappointed me lately. After that happens so many times I have just gotten to where I don’t care what these people who don’t even treat me right think! I had 2 friends over last night. We were talking. One of my friends started talking about something I was interested in and I knew my other friend would think it was weird. The old me wouldn’t have said much, not acted too interested and let the subject die. But last night I decided I wanted to talk about this and hear what my one friend had to say and if my other friend thought it was weird then tough! I’m happy I did that!

I am trying a raw diet for a week. To a lot of people that probaby seems really weird. I have one friend in particular who is not very open minded and I know she would think the raw diet is a stupid idea. I was going to try to keep it from everyone because I figured they don’t need to know what I’m doing. But, I was with this friend and needed to stop by the health food store and talk to the lady there about what I am eating. I really didn’t want to go with my friend because she is so close minded but it was either go with her or not go at all. I decided I don’t care what she thinks. I am just going to be myself and tell her what I’m doing and if she thinks it’s weird so what! I feel pretty proud of myself for just being myself in front of her and not hiding but it’s just a baby step!