Dear 43 Things Users,

10 years after introducing 43 Things to the world, we have decided we have met our last goal: completing the incredible experience that has been 43 Things. Please join us in giving one last cheer to all the folks who have shared their goals with the world, as well as all the people who have worked at The Robot Co-op to build this incredible website. We won a Webby Award, published a book, and brought happiness to a lot of people.

Starting today, 43 Things users can export their goals and entries from the site. Starting August 15, we will make the site “read only”. 43 Things users will still be able to view the site and export their content, but we won’t be taking any new content from users. We hope to leave the site up for folks to see and download their content until the end of the year. Ending on New Year’s Eve takes us full circle.

It has been a long ride (one of our original goals was to "build a company that lasts at least 2 years” - we beat that one!) While we wish the site could live on, it has suffered from a number of challenges - changes in how people use the site, the advertising industry, and how search engines view the site. We wish the outcome was different – but we’ve always been realistic about when our goals are met and when they aren't.

As of today, you will be able to download your goals and entries. See more about that on the FAQ page. Thanks for 10 great years of goal-setting and achieving.

- The Robots.

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FAQ

Solena D. is doing 19 things including…

be my own best friend

58 cheers

 

Solena D. has written 4 entries about this goal

I am on a date with me, yes I am

Because B is away tonight, having dinner with his company, and I feel way too weak and yucky to do any baking or cleaning, as originally intended, I think I’m gonna treat myself to a long bath, take a gigantic cup of tea to bed and have an early night.
Some nights, this is the best I can do.



Analyze this

Image by Maggie Taylor

Yesterday was my first therapy session. It was the getting-to-know-each-other one, and I’m not so sure what to think about my psychiatrist. She was kind, but kind of smug and I felt judged (could this be only in my head, a natural reaction to a completely new situation?) and left her office a bit sad and confused.

She hit some things right on the head, but with other, I feel she may be way off. For example, she seems to believe that my not wearing any make-up is a sign of me not accepting I am not a child any more, as well as a poorly conducted transition from childhood to womanhood, whereas my reasons for not painting my face are simply that I feel psyically uncofortable wearing make-up, it doesn’t suit my face, and also I find the idea of it, well…offensive? demeaning? (in a way…I’m not about to start a revolution. To each his own.)

Also, she said that my attachment to my grandma was of unhealthy nature – apparetly I was supposed to go out and have fun occasionaly while my granny was on her (what we thought at the time) death bed, while I think my sole presence made her feel better.
Doc says that while I fear for gran, and keep a strong face in front of her, I’m not being honest.
I can’t really wrap my head around this. What I did was: tell gran she was strong, and everything was gonna be fine, smile, kiss her cheeks and give her anything she might need, and then go to the kitchen to cry my eyes out in fear and pain of watching someone I love suffer.
What would have been the healthy reaction?
“Oh gran, you have such high temperature, I’m afraid you could die tonight, but I’m OK with it, because it’s a natural part of life”?
I think not.

If she plans to “cure” these kind of things in my behaviour, I don’t think we’re gonna last, but I’m willing to see her again.
Oh, and she also prescribed me AD medication, which makes me officially depressed, I believe.
What a way to end a year, huh?
I don’t feel very victorious, all with the courage this took, and the bloody orange banner is sure not helping.
Off to pop another happy pill.



Getting help

photo credit

Here goes…I’ve been feeling like crap these last few weeks.
Yes, the new apartment is great, yes, my family is healthy and safe (knock on wood), yes, B and I are in a very good place (bless his patient and kind heart), but…there’s so many things lurking from underneath…mostly my old piled up stuff that refuses to go away.

Grandma caught a cold of some sort a couple of weeks ago, and given her age, I went mad with worry. I was going completely nuts for a week. Called mum on the phone just about every hour, starting as early as 6.30AM and finishing the day with a 11PM phonecall.

(Grandma’s better now, knock on wood until your fingers hurt.)

With the toll this took on me, the work stress, my mum’s cousin (whom I loved dearly) dying, problems concerning my darling nephew, constant rain for over 3 weeks, and the afore mentioned pile of rubbish that weighs me down every single moment of my waking life, my inner self started to crumble.
I am depressed again.

I feel the cobwebs in my mind.
I feel the coal in my soul.
Hugging someone feels awkward at best.
All the noises sound like coming from a water well.
I can’t sleep.
All food tastes the same.
I will go from deep sadness to rage in a matter of seconds.

I went to the doctor today. I cried my eyes out in her office, and she gave me some pills to help me get through the next two weeks, when I’m having my very first therapy session. I can’t say how I feel about this, because right now, feeling is an unachievable task.

Wish me luck.



I'm sad to report

I’m failing so miserably at this goal.
Not a very motivating first entry, I know, but it’s true.

Today I took the first step: I sat in my office – my head pounding, my chest about to explode, crying my eyes out over the phone with B, and then I got up and went outside, and into the brand new bookstore that opened only last week, and is now the biggest one in town.
Being in the presence of so many books calms me down, and stationary stores are Heaven on Earth for me. It helped a little, but it’s more important because it was a conscious step towards helping myself, treating myself to something and being my own friend for once.

I can already tell: it’s gonna be a long and winding road, this one.



Solena D. has gotten 58 cheers on this goal.

 

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