master cleanse

Well yesterday was fine, except that i was starving for most of the day and didn’t really drink enough LA. Today i will drink much much more! I know from my past cleanse that the first 3 days are the hungry ones, after that its plain sailing!
My sense of smell has already improved, i can smell food a mile off, its so vivid that i can smell everything on a plate before i see it!

When i woke up today my energy levels were really bad, i put that down to not drinking enough of the LA Yesterday. I solved this little problem by having a 2tbls shot of syrup before my first glass of LA! Sorted!!!! A great trick for pepping yourself up if you start to go under!

Role on Day 3

I Know I Know I Know I Know!

Dr Burroughs says you must stick to the cleanse for a MINIMUM of 10 days!

Well I aint got 10! So 9 will have to do! I’ve started today, well I’m fasting, but I’m going to have a little to eat so I can have some wine with friends this evening!
.... but then i will start proper tomoz!

However the problem is that i have a function on the 30th! Hmmm I recon i can MC till the 28th, then do OJ on the 29th Hehehe… then partake in a few nibbles on the evening of the 30th! Now I know I won’t get the benefit of a FULL CLEANSE but I’ve done it before and i think the real benefits are felt by days 7 and 8!

As for Home Made Veggie Soup day …..well ill just have to miss that one out! It just made me crave solids anyway! Lol im fully aware of what happens if you feed your body a bit early (...see earlier entry where I developed a horrible rash and thought I was going to die)

Anyway WiSH Me LUCK!

P.S Has anyone else tried a slightly shorter cleanse? How were your results?

Does anyone know when you’re supposed to do the liver flush? Do I do it on day 11 before I start my OJ? Or do I do it after day 12 when I’m ready to eat again, i.e. after my OJ and vegetable Broth?

A link to precise instructions would be nice as there isn’t much in Dr Stans book on when to do it.

Regards

Don’t eat, Don’t Eat, DON’T EAT!

Ok Ok Ok, I didn’t exactly eat, I more kind of was cooking a curry for a diner party and tasted the sauce a few times to make sure it was right! Just a few small teaspoons throughout the day, oh and errrr one small bit of potato! The worst thing about it is (well actually this is the worst bit, the next bit is) that I wasn’t even hungry, I just like eating and without thinking I eat this small bit of potato; it was no bigger than my thumb I swear!

20 Minutes Later!

Sharon: James whats that rash on your face?
James: What rash?
Sharon: Your cheeks are all red and spotty, it looks really bad, does it hurt?
James: Rash? Hurt? Spots? Help!!!!!

I looked in the mirror and yep, RED SPOTTY RASH!

Now then, Dr Stan does say not to quaff the odd thing because; and I quote, “You wont feel the full benefit of the cleanse”. Now if, instead of writing that he had written; “Because Bad Shits Gonna Happen!”. I wouldn”t have eaten that damn piece of potato!

Anyway, the great thing about this little journal is that you people can learn from my mistakes, and seen as Dr Stan doesn’t provide any instructions for what to do if you accidentally without thinking eat something small and harmless ive taken the liberty of compiling a small set of Disaster Recovery Instructions!

Disaster Recovery: In case of accidental consumption of non-stanly substances.

STEP ONE: PANIC
So far the only test case I’m aware of produced symptoms of Nausea, Stiff Joints, Muscle Ache, Energy Drainage, Ohhh and a Red Spotty Rash to the cheeks! If your lucky this may be how your body reacts, if however your unlucky then there is no body of medical evidence available to predict exactly how painful the experience might be! Brace Yourself!

STEP TWO: DRINK YOUR LEMONADE
Now, you could be dieing! In a normal situation, having starved oneself for a number of days, the prospect of sudden death might prompt you to quickly go and eat all those lovely foods you’ve recently been deprived off! However, seen as it was food that presented you with this particular death situation, eating more will surely kill you. That’s is assuming you haven’t eaten enough to kill you already!

Once you realise that food could or may be killing you, the lemonade tastes much better! Drink fast and hope it manages to sufficiently dilute whatever’s in your stomach, enough to save you life!

STEP THREE: START EXTRACTION PROCEDURE
If you’re still alive, you need to get those insurgents out of you body. As the lemonade effect wares off there attacks will again become more pronounced SWF, and quickly!

STEP FOUR: PRAY
Even if you don’t believe god exists, do this anyway, it might help!

I remember how lovely it tasted on those first joyous (although damn hungry!) MC days. I especially enjoyed the tangy zing afforded to it by my extra large measures of cayenne, but alas START SINGING “Oh, those days seem so far away, Now it looks as though that taste is here to stay, Oh I believe, In yesterday, take the taste away”

Now I hate the cayenne edge, I find myself putting less and less in each time! Ive also gone back down to half syrup cos I cant stand that maple taste anymore!

My sense of smell has gotten amazing, I can smell everything miles before anyone else can. Me and a mate had lemon tea (Just hot water and Lemon, try it!) but he put honey in his. And if you’ve read what our cultish leader, Dr Stan has to say about bees and honey you will understand why I refrained….

I recon he ran into a bee’s nest when he was a kid, got stung all over and had to endure a painful examination while the docs attempted to remove the stings from his sore little body! Yeah, that explains everything!

Anyway, me and my friend proceeded upstairs and I could really smell sweet sweet honey all the way up. I told him how nice it smelt and that I was so jealous that the evil doc had band me from partaking in the consumptions of such substances! He said he couldn’t smell anything!

I work up feeling really low on energy and dehydrated! On day 4 I was only able to manage 3 glasses of LA, I don’t think the fact that I was trying to save money by halving my syrup (its Damn expensive here!) intake helped either. The SWF wasn’t easy either, I knew I had to re-hydrate myself but couldn’t until I finished “Flushing”. I just had to sit dead on the sofa for an hour while the SWF did its dark magic! Anyway, as soon as it was gone I had a glass of LA with the full ration of Syrup, I even grabbed a tip from IncandenzaH and quaffed a whole tablespoon of the stuff neat prior to feasting on me homemade LA!

Didnt take too long before i was tip top again!

Not as hungry as i was on days 1, 2 and 3 but im still on foodie mode! Ive been looking for Recipes and making lists of all the things im going to cook when i finish! Im even going to write a cook Book! Ohhh deviled kidneys and Proper Texas Style Chili! Does anyone know a great Chili recipe? Im kinda going for the NYC Daisy May’s BBQ USA style of Chili, with no Tomatoes and a bit of Brown Sugar, lol all i need now are the other Ingredients.

And Please dont any of you start Preachin what the good Dr Stan says about Meat being Toxic!! I Like Meat and ill eat it! But ill only eat meat thats had a good life, Happy Cows Taste Better!

P.S If your in NYC and you aint been to Daisy May’s go! But go to one of the Street Carts, its the best street food in NYC! Lol, but they make everything in the resturant, so it aint as dirty as all the other carts!.... anyone else got a fav NYC cart?

Im not sure if this is good or bad but i dont think my tea is as potent as yours! I couldnt get Just plain old senna tea, i had to get a generic herb lax that has senna and a few other bits and bobs in it!! Ginger i think! Its just a lax Blend! I dont get cramps and i dont have to run to the mens room but it does mix it up in there! Perhaps tonight ill have two of emm!

Now Im Worried, do you recon my tea is doing the job?

Hi, Any of you British people out there might like to know that Argos have got a 600W Juicer reduced from £50 to £25! So why dont you go out on what im dubbing OJ Day, buy yourself a load of fresh OJ’s and Get Juicein!

Aparentlly its Louder than a Vacume Cleaner, but hay you cant complain for 25 quid! Ohhh and as its argos you can take it back within 28 days if you dont like it!

http://www.argos.co.uk/static/Product/partNumber/4227308/Trail/C%24cip%3D42001.Kitchen%2Band%2Blaundry%3EC%24cip%3D48251.Juicers%2Band%2Bcoffee%2Bmakers.htm

Sorry for the size of the link, its the “Cookworks Signature Whole Fruit Juicer”