Collect 100 random quotes from everyday life conversations

Talking to my friend Chris today about my black eye that I recently got from playing lacrosse.
me: it makes me look tough!
chris: ermm
chris: or like an abused child/gf

then,
“well, i don’t want * to rape me in my sleep, and I know that you won’t do that”
-my sister

then,
“well considering i only got 2 hrs of sleep last night i think my sleeps already more messed up than Paris Hilton”

and
“she swallowed my story because i’m that delicious”

both from aaron! :]

I think this makes me up to 6 quotes.

“are you talking to yourself?”

-my mother.

I was studying at the library yesterday for my math test, and there were these two little girls, probably like 10. anyways, they got out this french-english book, and one of the girls said, “man, i can’t find any body parts in here”

it was hilarious.