make more love

and things are fine ;-)

As much as I like the lingo of this goal, it does scream highly sexual. If I could I would redo it to say Love more, tis silly to make love, love is abundant, does not need to be made to be enjoyed. Most love making leads people to heartache, or poor decisions. I would love to make more love, in every sense, but at what cost. I have never crossed my dignity for a lover, though were I less the man I would….and this goal would not be here…so focus on love more, and hopefully the lingo of this goal is not far behind.

Its pouring (seriously record rain in New England), but my sex life is dryer than the sands of the Sahara desert. A lesson for the ladies, men not getting sex makes men do stupid things to get sex, and in my cases, I don’t do the stupid things. Whomever I mingle with next in a relationship is going to get it good, whips and chains all up in this House! Just kidding I am not a bondage kind of guy, or am I?

Well, since my last entry I have done decent on this goal. I can’t say I am a man whore by any account, but I am open to possibilities. So I visited one gal, we were clicking well, and we were into each other at the time, so we had sex. It was great, I did it with the intention of being longer term, but we didn’t click so well after the fact. Guess I suck in bed. Currently I am dating a girl I think is real cool, she is very silly, adventurous, kind, and other uber adjectives. Right now were making the best of “it” and I feel comfortable with the way things are going, and she helps that, which is a good thing, but she doesn’t think I suck in bed, and sometimes a guy just needs confidence to perform well. I look forward to all future possibilities, but this goal ain’t complete yet, still more on the list.

I feel like beggars can’t be choosers, and if I had a committed offer of sexual relations, I would take it. Maybe once I have more sexual experience under my belt I can go back to the romantic stuff, but for right now romantic antics is running me solo. Though I am still holding out for a special gal, but in a month I’ll have answers to that question, and if its no, well then I am selling my soul.

I see there is a bit of chatter to my other entry, and instead of making it extremely lengthy I figured I would start a new one. To galishka’s question, I think you are viewing my idea with hindsight, which makes them look like two different paths, theres the knowing and the trusting and caring aspect. And by the way this is to clarify, because it is a paradox in itself. Look at it from the event of when it happened, I can say NOW that I didn’t really know the person I slept with, but what were my thoughts THEN. You care and trust someone first, its an unspoken agreement, there is a trust that he/she isn’t a serial killer, you use trust before you use knowledge of the person. Realistically if we were a newly dating couple, you would have my trust, and if you ever claimed to know me I would doubt your position, I have lived for 21 years, and you much longer, to really KNOW someone is impossible, change always happens. So you see Trust comes first, now at that same present time when we feel this way, is when you include my statement “You don’t really know someone until you have had sex with them”. So we have sex and now because ideas never stay the same, you have a evolution of caring and trusting, one can realize that by caring and trusting the sex can become more intimate. I hope that clarifies things, that its a trust/care-sex-new idea of trust/care, not 2 seperate things. Thats the paradox, its how they are so closely related. This of course is just my theory based on experience. So its a good question, but it simply is as it is. I suppose it depends upon the person what comes first, some people need to know you before they can trust you, I am not one of those, you have my respect then my trust, then my friendship, whereas most people operate as such respect,friendship, and then trust. So it depends upon the person. Hope that clarifies that issue.
Briefly, Kayla, #1 Why wait, sex makes little sacred, people make marriage sacred, not sexual acts. Remember around X-mas time when you were a kid, and you couldn’t wait to open your presents? And when you did it was exactly what you wanted? Well Sex is better then that. 2# people are capable of being safe, there are methods to do such. Fear of something is never a good reason to NOT do something.

I am in a sad predicament, because I love sex, and I love connecting with a partner, but I need a connection. I can’t just go out and fuck someone, its cold and it views the woman as an object of my lust, and I want to make love because together we are subjects to passion, see the difference, being a object is one thing being a subject is another. And sex is far superior when its with someone you care about and trust.