talk less, listen more

(Ha! That’s what they must all say about talking to me!! he he he!)
I just was at a Christmas party and I got caught in conversations with two people that continued on and on and on. I had to, politely, excuse myself on both occasions.

I oscillate between being a GREAT listener and being an EXASPERATING talker! I think the super-talking is also linked to feelings of being depressed or trapped at work.

ok, ok, I will keep working on it. Any ideas?

Sometimes I talk in large groups a lot because I just want to be heard. I think that I could learn to listen.

I don’t know how to be a good friend. I feel like a get distracted and dump all of the stresses on my day. It’s hard because it feels so good for me, I just realize that life is short and not everyone wants to experience and know all of my life frustrations so intimately!
This seems so simple, but I sometimes feel like I am going crazy. And yet I’m not going to share that. Who am I, if I’m not myself… or if I let the people around me suggest that I truly am a little crazy!

Yesterday I was on a roll with comments that I really needed to hold in. It’s amazing, I think I’ve grown into a new way of communicating, but I still keep getting caught and hurting people around me.

A genuine friend asked why I didn’t consider become a professional psychologist, “you’re a great listener”, she said. (I’m currently worried that I’m wasting my life away in an underpaid, but fulfilling job.)
It’s funny how one amazing kind word like that can help erase years of: “has aaaany one told you that you are annoying!?” ...my most received comment in junior high.

...this is my service to humanity