Grow in Christ

It is a new year. A brand new start. A chance to try again. I know the beauty of being a daughter in Christ is that every day is new. God gives us new beginnings every moment.

But sometime it is good to pause and reflect on just how close are my beliefs reflected in my life. I wish they were closer. I am not bad. I am not obviously selfish. I am certainly not evil. But … I am not GOOD either.

Sometimes my life is so ordinary. My love and passion for Christ comes out so muted and colorless compared to what is really inside me. How can I expect to be a light in this world?

As I ponder my “things”, resolutions, and goals, I wonder -does my life reflect the order in which I list them. Do I put God first. Is my life consistent with the ideals I hold true.

“Jesus replied: ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: Love your neighbor as yourself. All the Law and Prophets hang on these two commandments.’”

I must re-arrange my priorities around the things that matter most. Not just what I say matter most, but what my checkbook and calendar say matter most.

I need to make specific adjustments to my schedule so that I pursue the things in my life that will make the changes I desire. I will make planned focused time to enjoy my relationship with God. I will treat my body with care and respect that requires. I will work on the relationships in my life that matter. I will cultivate friendships. I will give more of my talents, time, and resources to God’s work.

This will take some thought. It is so easy to say (or type) these things but I need to evaluate what actual steps I need take to in order put them in to practice.

I am not anyone “special” in any way that is different from anyone else but I love the Lord and he has blessed me so greatly. He has given me indescribable peace and joy. I want to share this gift. It is so sad to know that there are so may people in such desperate need of God’s unconditional love. So many hurts, fears, and pains that God could sooth, so many souls he longs to comfort. I desire that my life can be use as a witness to those that need the Lord the most.

So easy if I can only let go. Let go of my foolish desires. Let go of my stubborn selfishness. All the things that give me temporary pleasure and empty satisfaction. Things that I know are not pleasing to the Father’s eyes. Things that in and of themselves are not particularly evil or wrong, but God has whispered and I have to obey (or not)
I know the joy of abiding in His love so why is this a struggle. I know the peace that comes from doing His will. I have not kept up my end in our relationship. He is always there. He is always loving me. He is always waiting for me.
I want to be more Christ-like. Lord please help me. Lord please forgive me. Love Always, Your Daughter.

How can I expect to grow if I don’t nourish myself properly. I’ve let being busy inch its way into my time with Christ. It is so easy to slide.

Nothing dramatic -just waiting to late to read my bible so that when I get to it I’m too sleepy to really focus. Or running out the door in the morning with a fast token prayer instead of a deep meaningful time to really confess and rejoice with my maker.

God is so patient and gentle with me. It is so my loss. I really want to get back on track. It is so wonderful knowing he is always wholly there even when I am not.

I want to continue to grow closer to Christ. Read my Bible more, pray more, keep my focus on living for Him instead of for myself. I want my will to become more like His will, but it is a daily struggle.