I think to accomplish this goal, I need to find out what the status of my friendships are. Some friends I have had since Grammar School, and some I made in Highschool. And since we are all in College in diffrent places now, I feel like everyone is kind of everywhere. And everyone is so into being p. correct that we miss the boat. One is away at school trying to figure out a relationship between someone shes always loved and a new guy that her parents hate, and on top of being pre-med, its a bit too much. Keeping in contact is a little crazy. Then there is him, who is commuting to school, and he confuses me to no end. Most of the time we are best buds talk and talk. And then we go through luls where we don’t talk forever. And he puts it on me like it is my fault.And I truely miss him and wish I could talk to him everyday, but I don’t get that same want from him. Then there is another one who she is best friends with the enemy, so I feel like I can only say a limited amount of what is going on in my life so that it doesn’t get around. Girl who fled to Hawaii is with a boyfriend who is abusive when intoxicated. Which I feel partly responsible for because I introduced them…Now shes across the country in paradise. Then there is curly-q who I feel bad for half the time. She is always working, always in school, always doing something to earn money. I love her more than words can say. I feel like out of all my friends, she will make it, and he wonderful, and thats another one I never get to see. And I feel like I have built this wall up around me where I try not to care so that when I do see them, I don’t break down and say I NEED YOU!!! But one day I will, and they will think I am crazy…but guess what I am!!
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