find my passion

Of course I do not know whether this will last till the rest of my days, but right now running became my passion. I mean, I do not care about the world-class athletes or watching Olympic races on TV, but I became addicted to the local-level running scene and the people who are creating it and are part of it. And I want to be one of them.

since I was a teenager I always wanted to become a scientist. So I did. I became an experimental nuclear physicist traveling around the globe to collaborate on different projects, perform various experiments or give talks at workshops and conferences. And I loved it. I believe I have made it big considering my short and young career, but somehow I ran out of steam. I spent last year litterally dug-in the experimental hall with all the cables, detectors and electronics without a single weekend free from June till late December, from September on even without a single day off, working like an idiot on an extremely ambitious project. The project seems like it succeded (but the analyses of results still will take like 1-2 years) so I should feel proud and happy, but instead I feel empty and demotivated. I even consider quitting the science or at least retreating to some small hidden university. The passion for this job is somehow just gone, and now I am just counting hours till I can leave my lab/office.