Post entries about the day to day life with my children

When I was growing up I was in Girl Guides, starting with Brownies. Although the memories are hazy, they are pleasant happy memories. Memories of an easier time and place. A safe place where you were always surrounded by friends and an unconditional acceptance. Somehow the environment just created an atmosphere where cliques and competition ceases to exist (at least in my memory). This year I put my daughter in Sparks, “where the Guiding adventure begins” It has only been 3 weeks and the last 2 weeks were spent selling cookies but she is so enthusiastic and she was absolutely delighted when she received her first badge.

When we first started she would just thrust the box of cookies toward them as soon as they opened the door and said ”$4 a box!” I explained to her how to greet them when they opened the door and what to tell them about the cookies. So she lead with it every time and being the actress she is, gave it her own dynamic flair. We were only turned down at 3 doors and you could tell it pained them to do so. Part way through she got the idea of taking her hat off and telling them to put the $$ in the hat. Naturally I had to explain she needed to wait to find out IF they wanted any cookies before she “asked” them to put the $ into the hat. Fortunately most people understand the ways of a child and were only amused by her “selling” techniques.

*picture is from their site, not of my daughter

Today I had a conversation with my daughter about the girl in her class who is confined to a wheelchair because her “muscles don’t work”. I could feel her curiosity, but also her compassion and acceptance without question or discomfort. My daughter is highly sensitive, and while it can sometimes be a challenge, it is one of things about her I absolutely love.

Today I finally answered his request to do the weeding together. I need to put them off much less often, we both enjoyed it, in fact he was enthusiastic. He has always been one who likes to be hands on and involved in anything the adults are doing. I should take every opportunity to encourage this side of his personality, even if it is time consuming it is time well spent. Much better spent than a lot of the time wasting I manage to do. Yes, today we did some weeding together, but we also did some growing together. I can hardly wait to start the new garden in the Spring, unfortunately I know nothing about Gardening so I will have to make that a goal I suppose.

The population here is growing and the schools are getting crowded. In my daughters school there is 4 Kindergarten classes with 26 kids in each class so they’ve added 2 new teachers and divided the classes to make the class sizes a more reasonable 17. In my daughters case the classroom is moving to the music room and being divided into 2 classrooms and a new teacher is coming aboard. Today the new teacher was introduced, but in talking to my daughter she understood some of the changes but didn’t realize she was going to have a new teacher. When I explained it to her there were instant tears, I didn’t have the heart to tell her that her friend who was in playschool with her also wont be in her class anymore. I figure one blow at a time, poor kid. It’ll be okay though, her current teacher told me the 2 classes will have lots of interaction since they are sharing a classroom.

I enrolled my son in skating lessons and he was so pumped, so much so that it made me nervous. I was sure he had visions of himself going on to the ice and skating like a Pro-Hockey player and that he would be disappointed to find himself spending more time on his bum than his skates. His Dad prepared him for this inevitably,and while I didn’t agree entirely with his approach I kept quiet because he was after all being a Dad and that’s something I never want to discourage, but sometimes do. Keiran continued to count down the days on the calendar and was so excited as we headed out the door. Dad was disappointed to miss his first lesson but was feeling rather rough with a nasty cold that has been making it’s rounds. Alexandra came along to be his cheering section. Keiran, as I expected fell down repeatedly but to my great pride he never once got frustrated and his perseverance was amazing. In a mere 45 minutes I was seeing improvement and I could tell he noticed it too. When it was time to go he didn’t want to leave. I knew he wasn’t the type to give up easily but there was always that chance so it felt really good to see him not get discouraged. In fact I was surprised that not one of the kids there got frustrated. I’m not so sure how Alexandra would cope with it because she doesn’t like doing anything she can’t master in the first 5 minutes. I think having her watch his lessons will help prepare her and when she expresses an interest I will sign her up. She starts Sparks in 1 week and I am excited for her. It feels good to have the kids involved in outside activities.

There are days when the demands of Motherhood seem like they leave little room for “much” else. Truthfully I’m lucky that I have as much balance as I do, but still I sometimes feel I don’t have much left over. But in recent months I have been reflecting on how fortunate I am to be a Mommy. The worse thing I could ever imagine would be to lose one of children, second to that would be to lose my partner or to lose my own life and the opportunity to watch my children grow up.

I bought a People Magazine a little while back that featured Patrick Swayze on the front cover. I wanted to read about how he has been doing in his fight against pancreatic cancer, but instead I ended up reading the story about Matt Logelin. It was a heartbreaking story about life and death in the span of 27 hours. It started with the birth of his daughter and “ended” with the death of his wife. He had been blogging during his wife’s pregnancy to keep their families involved in what was happening and he continued to blog after his wife’s death, sharing his experiences bringing up his precious daughter Madeline and coping with loss of the love of his life and mother of his child. I thought about how Liz (his wife) never even got a chance to hold her daughter and I realize how incredibly lucky I am. My daughter loves her bedtime ritual and I have sometimes felt slightly impatient to move on with things and start enjoying my alone time, but now I soak it all up, knowing these days will be gone before I know it and I will be lucky to get a kiss goodnight. My son is a Momma’s boy through and through, it has been trying at times and I have dreaded the day when I try and drop him off at Playschool and he clings to me, screaming and bawling for me not to leave. But now I am trying to stop and live in the moment. He is all about his Mommy, I can’t leave without hugs and kisses, and everytime it’s 2 of each and they are always so heartfelt. He loves to come up to me and just drape his arm across my neck for little cuddles, he doesn’t want me to leave after reading him stories and tucking in and prefers I stay until he’s fallen asleep. One day he will not want me to hold his hand or kiss him in public or in front of his friends.

My daughter started swim lessons today, this is her second time taking lessons but it has been about 2 years. During her swim lessons I take my son to the Child Minding offered at the center. This will be good for him as he is VERY much a Mommy’s boy and recently he’s been especially challenging. In addition to going to the Child Minding he is going to Preschool once a week for an hour. Currently I am there with him but gradually I will separate from him. On our way there I explained I would be dropping him off and taking his sister to swim lessons. He was quiet for a bit and then said “But Mommy wont that hurt me?” It took me a few moments to realize how he interpreted “drop him off”. After a brief explanation he was reassured I wouldn’t be DROPPING him but would be leaving him there. He wanted me to stay but let me go without a scene. I returned a short moment later because I forgot our swim bag and he was still guarding the door. At the end of our swim lessons when I returned to pick him up he was sitting on the lap of one of the workers looking a little distressed. He never did get comfortable and start playing but at least he wasn’t completely inconsolable, in time I know he will adapt and this will be a positive step forward. I love him dearly but definitely we need a little space apart.

The other day I was making lunch and asked my daughter if she wanted a Grilled Cheese Sandwich or Peanut Butter and Jam. She chose the Grilled Cheese Sandwich and when her Daddy came upstairs she asked him if he wanted a BOY cheese sandwich or a Peanut Butter Sandwich. _{for anyone still confused Grilled Cheese if not pronounced clearly kinda sounds like “GIRLED cheese”}

Last night was my daughters first ever Christmas Concert for playschool and was truly unforgettable. The teacher had been diligently practicing with the kids and asked parents to try and do the same from home. When we remembered we made it part of her bedtime routine to practice our songs. Watching her in class I really wasn’t expecting much in the way of “singing”. I was impressed with one little boy in class who seemed to know the lyrics front and back and seemed to enjoy belting out the lyrics with great enthusiasm. During the Concert I watched in amusement, horror, and pride mixed with mild concern as my daughter proceeded to have a performance all her own. As the children stood in their respective places and dutifully “sang” their Christmas songs _{albeit forgetting much of the lyrics} my daughter thought it would be more entertaining to do her own version of “dancing” back and forth across the stage in front of her class. I can’t tell you if she sang a single note but I can tell you she was the cause of much laughter. Eventually she even managed to lead a couple other children astray. For the second number she went even farther “outside the box” and simply sauntered around, collapsing on the stage, bending over to touch her forehead to the ground and who knows what else! Through it all that same boy who had impressed me with his singing in class did his best to keep the group on track and could be heard through much of the performance. Once all the singing was wrapped up I saw my daughter, again moving about the stage, but this time singing the lyrics of Frosty the Snowman, and clearly. Proving I did practice at home with her!

Can’t fix it for him, and I hate it. Settling in for a long night