I’ve known for quite some time that i don’t have what it takes
to make somebody out of who i am, or was,
or to really make something out of my life.
I’m aware of not being self-centered enough to make it big, and if that’s what it takes, i’m frankly not interested.
People change, grow up, become different,
and i was recently told by a girl who means the moon to me,
“there is nothing worse than seeing your best friend change into somebody they’re not.”
Not long after that, this was, a matter of weeks ago,
a lifelong-childhood friend of mine told me, with concern in her voice,
“every time i see you, it’s like you’re not there.”
She continued by telling her conversation between her and another of my childhood friends:
“she said to me, ‘Since i moved away, i don’t feel i know MoonlightDreams anymore.’ And do you know what i said? I said ‘I still see her, but i don’t know her anymore either”
When i heard this, i replied,
do you know the saddest thing of all?
It’s that i agree with you.
That i know it’s happening.
Or happened.
I hardly even know myself anymore.
Who is it that I am?
And who is it I want to be?
let’s create b-a-l-a-n-c-e.
