have a better relationship with my dad

OH WEll .. Everytime I’m about to reach my goal someone pulls me back
, yeah my dad he just start throwing his harsh words on me without even
knowin’ how much does it hurt .. I just wish for one time that he stands beside
me whenever I needed him and encourage me for the best .. Everything I do
and everything I try to do means nothing to him .. I think I need help , oh wait I
dont .. He’s the one who needs help , I’m fine but he’s not , he just enjoy
treatin’ me like dirt .. There’s so many times that I felt like I want to run away
, OH I can’t stop tears from runnin’ down on my face … THE END

When I was about 7 or 8 my dad used to beat my mom everyday and I saw everything , I lived in fear .. I didn’t know what to do , how many times I begged him to stop but he never listened .. Now it’s been like 10 years and I still can’t forget what he did =( ..
Sometimes I feel like I hate him , and I’m not suppose to feel like that toward my dad .. Anyway I tried to fix it , it worked with me but it didn’t work with my dad .. So I think I should try harder ..