learn to forgive

Recently my now ex boyfriend betrayed me. At first I was soo angry with him. I wanted to kill him. I wanted to die. Everything made me angry. Everything reminded me of him and his betrayal. I thought I would never be happy again. I felt like I could never trust someone again. Especially not a male.

Although its only been one month, vs the two years we were together. I’m beginning to forgive what he did. I don’t know when I’ll honestly 100% forgive him, but I am trying my best to. Not because I want to be able to work things out with him (at this point its just not gonna happen) but because I want to truly move on and find inner peace. I don’t want this to affect my future relationships. I know I will move on and I know I will be happy again. I don’t want that tainted by the pain of the past.

i’ve been realizing over an extended period of time that forgiveness starts within yourself. i cannot forgive those who have done me wrong until i can forgive myself for letting it happen and all the wrong i’ve done to myself and even others. im not sure how im going to go about this. i expect it to be a hard road. but i AM going to do it.