I’m meant to be working on this goal today. On my way to work, I thought about it and figured that an easy way to start on this goal again, is to try not to gossip, because gossiping really is judging people. I can’t think how one could gossip without passing judgement?
Within ten minutes of me arriving at work, someone asked me ‘what did X say to you about Y yesterday?’ and before I knew it, I’d told them the whole story…. though it was true, though X was very rude, it was still gossiping. I could have just said, ‘oh that, it was nothing…’ Luckily, I remembered my decision shortly after opening my mouth and when the conversation moved onto X’s other faults, I didn’t take part.
Later on, a colleague made some bitchy remarks about another colleague, as it was only me and her in the office, it would have been easier for me to say ‘yes, I know, you’re right, she really is deluded…’ but, maybe to make up for my earlier failure, I didn’t say a word, just a quiet ‘hmm’. There was a slightly uncomfortable silence for a minute, but i felt good afterwards, definitely better than I did after dishing the dirt on X earlier.
I feel that since I’ve become more confident, it is easier for me to not judge people. Since I’ve realised that I am quite blessed and have a lot in life, I have stopped caring about what other people have, and hence also stopped judgeing.
Now I work with people who are so jealous of everything and all they see is people with more money than them, people with bigger houses, nicer cars etc. None of them have much money, but all they care about is money, they’re especially obsessed with other people’s money. The thing is that they also hate people with more money than them, which is kind of weird, because they clearly also want to be one of those people with lots of money… they think people who drive certain expensive cars are all arseholes, yet they want to drive that same car… hmmm…
I’m probably getting a bit side tracked here, but the point is, that listening to people I work with has made me realise that people gossip and judge others because they a jealous. And that is very sad, pathetic even.
Another reason for gossiping is to make yourself look/feel better, that’s sad too. I don’t want to be like that. I don’t think I gossip out of jealousy anymore, or if I ever do it, I’m quite quick to notice it and I am not pleased with myself, because I really do find it pathetic.
I’ve now completely forgotten why I started writing this and where I was meant to go with it… d’oh! I’m losing my mind.
The point is, I don’t want to judge people because it is not very mature, I’m doing less and less of it as I’ve become more confident, as I’ve seen more of the world and realised how fortunate I am, but I still gossip and judge too much, so I need to work on this goal more.
