get to know my family better

I visited my parents last night because they just came back from a holiday and it struck me that we talk about things, about what we do, what we saw, what we are going to do…and whilst I love them tremendously and I know they love me I wish that I knew how to really get to know them…Is is difficult because there are so many things we cant tell them for fear of shattering the illusions they hold of us? Is it to protect them from feeling with you a sadness that will pass quickly for you but will linger far longer with them? Is it because of the ultimate risk that they may not love you if they really really knew who you are? Is it because the person I have become is so different to them although at the same time so similar? I know I am terrified that one day soon I am going to get that call that something has happened to them and I am not going to ever get an opportunity to share me with them or really get to know them again…