be proactive instead of reactive

For 20+ years I have had a thyroid issue. And for many years just taking the replacement hormone on a regular basis worked. About 4 years ago, this stopped working and I would go to my GP who would just tell me to eat better and exercise. This was frustrating but I put up with it.

No more! I switched GPs and have been reading a ton about thyroid problems. I started supplementing with herbs, most didn’t seem to do anything but a few helped. I have an appointment next month with my GP and I want to have a bunch of tests run.

If I can’t get my medical provider to do this, I will seek outside help. It’s been too many years of suffering and I need to put an end to this. No wonder my PhD has taken so long. I barely have the energy to get through a day at work, let alone do anything else when I get home.

Sad, but I am finally aware of what is going on and I am taking action.

After attending the chili cookoff party at a coworker’s house last night, I want to host one. I could do this for my neighbors, or people from work, or both. I think I will start with my neighbors. We get together a few times a year and this could be yet another reason to get together.

I want to have the party outside. There are plenty of folding tables and chairs for people. Cleanup is easy. Who knows, this could become an annual event.

I found a great online resource for planning the party:
http://www.chicaandjo.com/2008/11/03/host-a-chili-cook-off-party/
Now I just need to pick a date and talk to some neighbors!

I shall do this before the end of March!!

I suggested that my boss and I meet with some people who have been an annoyance to me for the past 1.5 years. While there have been meetings in the past, this one was not something I was looking forward to since IMO the problem is that people do not know how to do their job – and that’s a tough thing to prove.

I wasn’t dreading the meeting but I didn’t really want to attend. I had to of course. The best thing I did was listen to people and let someone else respond. Most of the time someone else in the meeting provided the answer. As long as I let them talk the meeting almost could have taken place without me.

I don’t know if the situation was as obvious to others in the meeting. Part of me doesn’t care. I just want the ridiculousness to end, however I am not holding my breath.

“When nothing goes right… go left”. I LIKE this! I will put this on a post it and stick it on my laptop to remind me that there are always options.

So there have been some issues at work that were blown out of proportion because some people didn’t understand what was actually going on. Typical. And I was told to fix things that didn’t really fall under my responsibilities. In order to prevent this type of occurrence in the future, (as much as I can), I took steps to have some things checked out.

I also talked to some people about their area of work, and how they could help out by overseeing their people. There are times when I feel like it falls on me to be sure that everyone else is doing their job. And I hate this because I am fairly sure that they don’t like someone “suggesting” that they need to do something any more than I like it.

However I am not sure how to get this resolved. When I talk to the higher ups about this I am told to work with the lower level people. When I talk to the lower level people, they ignore me since I am not their boss.

Have I mentioned how much fun I have at work? Not!

I have decided to adopt a new approach at work. I scheduled two meetings to go over issues that someone else should be handling, but wasn’t. The first meeting was tricky because I needed someone to support me in asking people to follow the procedures I had established. Now that I am not reacting to comments as much, I managed to deflect the defensive comments directed at me and ask for what I wanted. It worked, so I was happy with the outcome.

The second meeting was also much easier than I had expected. I explained why I was calling the meeting, what we needed to review, and I pointed out some changes we had made to the application. That seemed to help, and most of the people were very receptive to trying what I had asked. During the discussion some other issues arose with the process, and I will follow up even though it is not my issue.

While I really dislike having to do other peoples’ jobs for them, in this case it was the least amount of effort to get people to do what I thought they needed to do.

If it gets me to the result I need, it will be worth it.

Either change me, or change how I react to him, or change my envrionment. I am doing all three.
First I am changing back to the person I used to be, the person who was happy and did fun things, and had lots of friends. Then I am changing how I react to him. No more letting him push my buttons. Sure I still react more than I should but the reactions are not as long and I can get back to normal quicker. The last one is the hardest because it says that this is over and I need to move on, I need to change my environment. That seems like I have failed, though I know what has actually occured is that I just trusted the wrong person. Trust is good. Trust is a very important value to me. Trusting the wrong person is hard. It can be very painful. And it shakes one’s belief. But I will not let one person stop me from trusting others. I will learn from this and move on with my life.

Why are you so insecure that you have to hurt someone who liked you and tried so hard to help you? What could you possibly be so afraid of that you would act this way? You traded someone who worked hard for people who hardly do anything. Good luck with that.

I am trying to deal with some resistance at work, so I scheduled a meeting with the managers of the people who are resisting. I forgot that these managers really do not want to manage their employees, so after some thought I decided on a different approach. I am organizing my managers to help come up with a plan of action.

I wish I could actually spend my energy getting things done rather than dealing with politics, however that does not seem to be an option right now.

Proactive. I meet with two coworkers for a chat and coffee today. One person I used to work with and have kind of lost touch with over the past few years. We just talked about the job situation and such.

The other person is someone I talk with every few weeks. She’s a great inspiration to me and has a unique way of looking at things. And I had an excellent cup of coffee too!

I tried to talk to my uberboss but the previous meeting ran over and we didn’t connect. Maybe later in the week.

About my career and suggested that I was interested in pursuing some new opportunities. He is busy with some other things at present but he acknowledged that we could discuss my ideas later on.

It is a start. I also need to update my resume to get ready for this plan. It feels good to know that I am not shying away from things.