start a photo journal - take at least a photo a day to represent my life

The Heard Museum in Phoenix, AZ was a really emotional experience for me. The newest gallery is a feature on American Indian boarding schools. My father was shipped to one when he was young, and the most traumatic experience he had was the day they cut off his hair…and this was happening as late as the 40s. It was an emotional visit for me anyway, but this exhibit really broke me down. In case you can’t read it, the quote behind the chair says,”The next day the torture began. The first thing they did was cut our hair…while we were bathing our breechclots were taken, and we were ordered to put on trousers. We’d lost our hair and we’d lost our clothes; with the two we’d lost our identity as Indians.”

Late last night. No make up, no lighting tricks, no bells and whistles, no photoshop…Just me…and accepting that I’m not so bad looking after all :)

Had an epidural pain block this morning to help with lower back pain until surgery. Also to give me a little relief during my flight to Phoenix. I convinced my insurance company to allow sedation this time, which was probably the only way I could’ve handled it. The local has worn off, and now there is just…pain. It’ll be over by morning, but this part sucks.

I love my bathroom. It’s tiny, but I decided to give up my evil red and black motif for something a little more grown up. I went with this colorful number for the curtain, and bought a matching rug and towel things.

I still want to get the bacon bathroom set from Archie McPhee’s.

This leather cube was shredded by a cat my mother had a few years ago. Tilley was a one-eyed cat, and a rescue. She wouldn’t let anyone but me touch her or hold her. Her favorite activity was driving my mother insane (which was something we had in common), and she liked to shred this leather cube just because it annoyed my mother (at least that’s what I thought). Staring at the cube today, for some reason, made me miss the hell out of that cat. She was put to sleep in 2002 with an aggressive feline cancer.

It’s funny how you can look at things every day and never think twice about them, and then one day it catches your eye and brings back memories.

Not a pleasant way to wake up in the morning. A charlie horse in my leg so bad I couldn’t get to the floor to stand on it. At 10:30 pm, it’s still tender.

For as long as I can remember, I’ve been a fainter when it comes to having blood drawn. Tattoo needles don’t scare me, and neither does getting shots, but when someone tries to extract bodily fluids via a giant gague needle, I’m a goner.
So, while my visit at the doc yesterday went well news-wise, I was a big ol’ Fainty McFainterson. This is the reminder I was left with when I woke this morning.

I found this purse, and I absolutely love it. It’s not exactly practical, but I don’t always carry a purse for practical reasons…

I mention him often in my daily grateful reflections. I thought it was fitting he have a place in my photo journal. So here he is…my Leo.

“The Nicest Thing” – Kate Nash

All I know is that you’re so nice
You’re the nicest thing I’ve seen
I wish that we could give it a go
See if we could be something

I wish I was your favourite girl
I wish you thought I was the reason you are in the world
I wish my smile was your favourite kind of smile
I wish the way that I dressed was your favourite kind of style

I wish you couldn’t figure me out
But you always wanna know what I was about
I wish you’d hold my hand
When I was upset
I wish you’d never forget
The look on my face when we first met

I wish you had a favourite beauty spot
That you loved secretly
‘Cause it was on a hidden bit
That nobody else could see
Basically, I wish that you loved me
I wish that you needed me
I wish that you knew when I said two sugars,
Actually I meant three

I wish that without me your heart would break
I wish that without me you’d be spending the rest of your nights awake
I wish that without me you couldn’t eat
I wish I was the last thing on your mind before you went to sleep

Look, all I know is that you’re the nicest thing I’ve ever seen
And I wish that we could see if we could be something
Yeah I wish that we could see if we could be something