So I decided to add this goal for now. I believe I had a momentary subconscious lapse of faith today in what I can do for myself to keep my life on track. (I didn’t realize what was going on at the time, and I had to think about it all day today.)
I don’t have as much of an esteem problem as I did, say, ten years ago. But sometimes I still get nutted up about what is happening in my life, and that originates in me not believing I can do the right things. Because even if life doesn’t move in the direction I want it to, as long as I know I am doing the right things, then I don’t mind and I can usually adjust (although others close to me sometimes still stay nutted up about where my life is at).
But I didn’t want to just pick the goal stated “believe in myself”, because it is much bigger than that. There is the giving it up to the Higher Power part of it all. So that, and doing the Right Thing (a Buddhist concept), is what Being Authentic is about.
I can resurrect a belief in myself and regain the motivation to take action again, but it is easy for me to execute steps that feel good but won’t help me achieve my goal. I have to resurrect the belief in myself that gives me the motivation to do the Right Things, which is a lot harder.
As I look back on today, I feel I chose to do the smaller Right Things, and that ended up being a step in the right direction.
