Make Friends in My New Town

We have met a few people – that will be ‘casual acquaintances’ but not really people we want to hang out with regularly. Our neighbors invited us over for a BBQ a couple weeks ago (just them and us – no one else there to meet). They are really nice, but have 1 kid and one that will be here any day now! :-) So that keeps them very busy and where we are childless – it makes a difference in when you can go out, or where you can go.

I just can’t seem to find a gal-pal who is near my age, and has no kids or older kids. I don’t want to put out a platonic-friendship ad on any list or website as one person advised—that’s too risky and not my style.

I haven’t met anyone at Curves (hard to do so when it’s a 30 minute circuit and everyone gets in and does their thing and gets out).

I miss my friends back home SO bad!! I’m going back in a month to visit – but will only be there 3 days so it’ll fly by quickly. I can’t wait though, to just be hugged by my pals and laugh with them, drink a few beers and sing with them, and just have fun like the old days. I just feel like no one understands me quite as well as my old friends. They’re like family. I’m so lonely for them.

So for now, when Hubby is working or traveling, my dog Lucie and my computer is my friend (what a nerd I’ve become!! lol I used to have a super full social calendar, belong to social groups, and always be on the go…Now I’m a stay-at-home NERD! OMG Nerd Police – HELP!! LOL)

We ventured out and went to meet some folks that are involved with the online discussion group we belong to. They were pretty cool and interested in similar things as we are…We also went to a dinner gathering (a munch) and met some more nice people…we are on our way to making some friends and meeting new people!! :-) I think my confidence is growing a bit more now again, starting to feel like my old social self.

I had a chance to go meet some new people today – at a discussion group meeting, locally. I found this group online and have exchanged a few posts with the ladies, but when it came down to going to their gathering today – I just couldn’t do it. I felt paralyzed—unable to make myself go. This is crazy! I just kept thinking about how I might feel self conscious or totally shy, and awkward, or that I’d seem like a dork. This is nuts, because I used to be so outgoing, confident, assertive and talk to people easily etc. Lately I hate to go to new places alone without my hubby and am feeling very shy, nervous and awkward in situations where I have to meet someone new. I hate this!! I think it’s from moving so far from home and just adjusting to totally new surroundings…and all the changes in my life in the last 2 years. I need to find a way to get my confidence back…I can’t stand feeling trapped within myself and my fears. Arg!!!!!!!

We just moved here about 4 months ago and the only people I know are those I work with…I miss having pals to hang out with. We are at least 6 hours away from “home” so we rarely get to see our old friends. We are wayyyyyy out in the NW Burbs of Chicago in a very small village (McHenry County area)...there’s not much to do here besides eat out, see a movie or shop (I’m so tired of stores that either end in “Mart” or have a grocery attached! LOL) The nearest Mall or BW3s is at least 30 mins. away…

It’s hard meeting friends to hang out with. The added dilemma is that we are “childfree by choice” and that makes it difficult to find other 30-something couples to do dinner, movies, concerts, karaoke with…Most of our friends back home were single or childless or had older teens who could be on their own.

Anyway…we are trying to find social groups or find a decent karaoke place, to hopefully meet some cool people to hang out with…I miss having a gal-pal (or a nice Queeny gorgeous gay guy pal) to go to the nail salon, shopping, bookstores, for a walking buddy, go see chick flicks, etc!!