write up my opinions on life / aka "life lessons"

Why I have not yet mastered this very simple, rewarding life lesson – I cannot explain. But it’s a classic. If you’re going to open up a bottle of pop? Open a bag of rice? pour something from one container into another? Transfer sugar from the bag to your sugar bowl?

For cripes sake! Do it over the friggin’ sink, will ya?

outta life! You never know how long you’re gonna have or what’s going to happen tomorrow so carpe diem! Eat dessert first, life is uncertain, baby.

a) Everyone experiments with alcohol eventually… but, like with sex, try to put off experimenting with it as long as possible – preferably til you’re 25.

b) OK, but if when you do, make sure you’re with someone you feel safe with who is trustworthy. Don’t get drunk for the first time (or ever) with the biggest bitch in your class, or with a guy you just met, or in a GROUP of people, even if they’re your best friends. This is a best-friends only type of thing.

c) realize that drinking and every other thing that can be considered a vice (drugs, gambling, eating too much, or anything else in excess that might give you a rush, etc.) is really, ultimately, a way to self-medicate. A way to try to fill a hole that can only be filled with feeling your emotions and dealing with them in a healthy way. People dump all kinds of shit in this hole and expect it to fill them up. And they do feel better temporarily, but each time you engage in the activity, that hole stretches and actually gets bigger so you end up with a bigger problem than you had when you started. No one seems to tell people this, but I really believe this to be true.

d) This is one of those things in life that at some point we all must learn the right ways to deal with sadness, and challenges in our lives and until we learn these types of lessons, we’ll just keep getting challenged over and over again TIL WE LEARN! So, you might as well either take my advice, or if you have to learn it for yourself, learn it quickly so you don’t waste your life trying to learn these dumb lessons and you can move on to bigger and better things!

e) With regard to trying drugs other than alcohol, I am not scared of occasional pot use… BUT I have seen people lose decades of their life in essence because of it, because it had a very de-motivating effect on them. As for other drugs, just DON’T GO THERE. I have seen people “go there” and it’s like inviting hell to come into your life. Hold a healthy fear of all drugs besides alcohol and pot, and realize that pot and alcohol ain’t gonna get you anything you want either. They’re just delaying the inevitable. And if you have inherited the body chemistry of an alcoholic you’re inviting hell into your life as well. Since there’s no test for that yet, be CAREFUL!!

Make sure you:

a) love or at least rrrreally like the person you are going to sleep with.

b) even if this person rrrreally likes you, it’s no guarantee that they didn’t catch something from the person they had sex with last week.

c) even if this person claims to be a virgin, hell, even if somehow you could know that they’re a virgin (which you can’t) you STILL should take the precaution of using a condom with spermicide. There are people who are very careless about safe sex practices and will willingly subject you to their history of carelessness. But it’s also true that nice people have things they don’t even know they have and unwittingly spread them to other nice people. So please – BE CAREFUL!

d) Oh also, bodily fluids can spread things too, so make sure you remain fully covered from start to finish, in all areas, etc. Sometimes people only think they need to use protection for the ‘main event’ but you really have to take precautions before things really get going. Remember that if you are careful MOST of the time, that’s not good enough – this is one of those absolutes. You have to be careful EVERY time.

e) Give yourself the gift of knowing your own mind (in everything – but especially on this subject). Do you want to? With this person? Do you know it for sure? Then do it. Don’t want to? Not sure? Then wait til you know. It doesn’t matter what the other person wants, unless you’re pressuring them to do something they might not want to do. Accept how crucial knowing your own mind is and respecting another person’s limits is to a happy, healthy sex life. Be assertive about protection and come prepared.

f) OK, enjoy sex! Don’t get too weird about it and try not to have hangups about it. It’s all good and natural – just make sure you’re protected and then there’s nothing to worry about. Thanks for listening.

When driving, try to maintain the proper distance behind the person in front of you. Always use your turning signal while turning AND while changing lanes. Keep your eyes peeled for what’s happening in the other lanes so you can respond more quickly if something happens. Don’t speed more than 10 miles over the limit or the coppers will nail your ass. Don’t run out of gas. Esp. at night, on the highway, or while it’s cold and rainy.