master cleanse

I decided to break the fast a few days ago.

It was an extremely good run and I can’t wait to do it again!

Katy is going to let me use her gym membership for free as often as I want, so I can keep up what I’ve started.
I hope I seriously go… I’ve been promising I’d go to the apartment gym for forever but I never went.
haha

Did SWF again after about five days.

TMI TMI TMI…
That “rope”/”string” thing came out. Eww it was really strange!

Been getting a lot of compliments. Skin’s clearing up a little more, I got some Vitamin E (finally!) and baking soda to help with it some.
Don’t really know why, but I’ve noticed that this process has washed out my face a little, but that’s tolerable. Gives me a good excuse to tan a lot more.
: P

Also picked up a huge huge bag of epsom salts to have some detoxing baths with. I didn’t get the ginger… I might save that for next week. I don’t want to feel like I’m sweating burn for a long time before I go to sleep just yet! haha

Forget day 8/9 when my throat was hurting… last night was definitely the hardest night I’ve had during this process.
Craving every single thing out there that I could get my mind to think of! I had it practically embedded in my head that I would end this tomorrow (today), I’m ‘detoxed enough’, I miss food, all of those things.

I’m really glad that it happened at night while I was already in bed. That, I can live with.
I woke up today in a MUCH better mood, almost like it never happened.

I’m going to have to pick up a different kind of tea this weekend. I really can’t stand the taste of this one! Lots of people have recommended the chocolate tasting one, also saying less cramps with that kind also, so I’m going to pick up some of that.

Arg, I did cheat some last night. She brought home Twizzlers… again… I had about five or six.

: /

So, I know/guess that this means that I have to start over, but I’m not going to let it get to me too much. I’ve never felt this guilty about eating something in my entire life. It almost feels like I just robbed a bank.
I feel that guilty, which I guess is a really good thing though.

I do look forward to the weekends, because this makes those two days on the MC go by really quickly. So Monday will be Day 15 and it’ll go by fast to get there.

One thing: I haven’t done an SWF since I last threw up on it, I think that was Sunday. That’s four days. I’m just really scared that it’ll happen again. I know that’s a really, really important part of this but I’m a little scared to start it again.
We’ll see how it goes over the weekend.

Good good good.

My tongue has gone down with the white furry layer. There’s only a small stripe of it on either side of my tongue. I have a feeling why it’s beginning to get pink again, because I’ve had to cut down a LOT with the mixture because I’m trying to stretch it out until this weekend. I’m maybe having between 3-5 glasses a day, usually 3-4.
I have to water it down a lot to make more, I’ve been using half the recommended amount of syrup (I read that it was okay), and the only thing I’m not skimping out on is the lemon and pepper, because I know that those are vital and you aren’t supposed to mess with those measurements.

Also, I bout about six big jugs of distilled water last week and most of them went a lot quicker than I thought. And those are a dollar each, which might not sound like a lot, but it really is to me! So I’ve also cut down on my water intake… which is something I’m REALLY not used to… so… mmhmm.

Anyway, something happened.
Last night I was watching some movies and I grabbed and ate about two handfuls of Cheerios! It was completely out of habit and I was really upset after that happened. But it’s a good thing that it was around the time where I can start to feel the LT working in my tummy, so that was okay.
: ]

I swear my stomach is about half its size.
And… lovehandles?
What lovehandles?
hehe

: ]

Down exactly 12 pounds in the 10 days. I’m keeping it up, I’m not stopping at 10 days, going for the 14 and then the 20… just playing it by ear!

I was also wondering whether it was hunger “pangs” or “pains” yesterday and looked it up.
It’s pangs!

(don’t read if you don’t want to hear about food!!)

Anyway… I get them every now and then, maybe once or twice a day now. It’s funny that at first I never got them and then almost around the time my throat started hurting the other day, I started getting them.
Oh well.

So what worked for me was whatever I’m craving, I just go to that website and just look at what I’m craving and read the ingredients, nutrition fact (especially), and all about it.
Like last night around midnight I was craving Pizza Hut. I went to their website and read this LONG list of every single type of pizza they make, and after about twenty minutes (haha it took a long time) of reading about everything I was satisfied and the cravings stopped.

One other thing… my body still can’t tell the difference between a craving and if it’s really hungry or not. Tons of people reported their bodies and minds being able to tell the difference, even after just the ten days, but I still can’t.
Hmm who knows.

Oh well!

The worst is over, throat back to normal.

: ]

Just weighed myself for the heck of it, lost 11 pounds. Woo hoo. haha
So, since about a month or so ago, I’ve lost 19 pounds. That’s pretty neat, I haven’t been this weight since… middle school or Freshman year of highschool. Even though a few of my clothes are somewhat a little baggier, it’s crazy really how almost 20 pounds off of me isn’t at all what I’d imagined. It’s amazing, don’t get me wrong, but I guess that it’ll take about another 10-15 pounds to see and feel a serious significance in my body. Only changes are my stomach and my face, but everything else is still the same.
Whatev, I’m still happy as a dolphin at Seaworld! haha

BUT more importantly, besides all of that, I’m sooooooo happy with myself for sticking with this for this long! At the beginning, through the first couple of days, I did NOT think that I would make it past day three or four. But here it is, Day 9, and there’s no way I’m stopping tomorrow.

I do have a 20-day goal for this but I’m taking it with steps. In my mind I was thinking “let’s go the ten days”, and now I’m thinking “let’s go the fourteen days”. Then after that, I’ll think “let’s go the TWENTY days!”

: ]

It’s all good.
I’m very, very happy with myself for having this kind of patience.

I’ve only told my dad and Katy about this, and my dad knows (from the first time I did this last year, those two whole days haha) that it’s perfectly fine and he understands this. But Katy’s different, I knew that she’d give me crap every day (in a nice way, though) for it, “but you’re not eating for [blahblah] DAYS!!!!” haha I tried to explain it to her in the most detailed way possible, but she still doesn’t get it.
But she’s still somewhat supportive, and I do like how she doesn’t go into another room to eat her dinners. She’s helping me be around food and not giving in by staying there in the living room, like always. And it works.

: ]

Good.
Throat still hurting a little but not as badly as it did yesterday. I think it might have something to do with the pepper, or even the acid in the lemons?
Not sure.
But I’ve watered down every glass of the lemonade to make it a little easier to go down and it’s helped some.

Skipped SWF this morning.
My stomach was still a little upset from yesterday and did NOT want to throw up again. That just pretty much ruined yesterday.
But I still had eliminations all day today, so that’s neat.

I had my first feeling of “oohh energy!” today. haha

I was sneezing for a few hours earlier today and felt a little stuffed up, and then around six or seven-ish my throat really started hurting and it was really, really painful with every sip of the lemonade.
I know that at some point some people get flu/cold-like symptoms so this could just be me going through that.

I know for a fact that I’m not getting “sick” because I’m around nobody that is sick, there’s no outrageous weather, and my immune system pretty much kicks ass.
: ]

I was only able to finish 32 ounces of the lemonade out of about 60 because of my throat. I looked down my throat with a mirror and couldn’t see anything out of the ordinary.

Anyway, I hope this warm tea helps and it’s done by tomorrow. Now I know for a fact that I’m going to have to tag on some make up days!

Day 8 in a few hours…

!

This is by far my first and hardest day.
I think most of it had to do with having a really, really late night last night (still kept on track, though!) and waking up sometime in the middle of the afternoon. That’s more hours without anything in my system, so I woke up feeling dizzy, and really shaky. I was starving and I was shaking the entire time I was making the SWF and the lemonade for today. It was really scary. I didn’t know what to do.

I downed the SWF, and took a few sips of the lemonade to help easy my nerves and get something in my stomach. About five minutes later I had the feeling that the flush was going to come right back up. I was right, and I threw it all up about fifteen minutes later.
Worst feeling ever, I haven’t thrown up in a long while.

After that, I decided that I’m still going to do the teas at night, but I’m definitely going to cut the flush to every other day, or every few days. If I want to stick through this I can’t have myself throwing up every single morning. It’s such a terrible feeling.

I’m doing good now, seeing very noticeable changes in my body. Mainly my midsection which is pretty neat. I know that that’s just a plus through all this, but I don’t mind it! haha

Had another headache about an hour ago that lasted about thirty seconds. That’s definitely something that I’m going to have to get used to.

I’ve been reading a lot on a forum I found about tons of people’s experiences through all of this, and most of them said that Day 7 and Day 8 were the hardest for them.
Tongue still has the white furry layer on it, and most of the people said that it wouldn’t go away until I’m done with the cleanse. I’m glad that nobody’s noticed, because I laugh a lot and I’m always scared somebody would point it out! But nobody has yet.

: ]

One thing that I am NOT looking forward to is the body smell. I know that’s more toxins leaving, and some people reported it around days 15-20, so… I’m going to do lots of detoxing baths to help with that.

Now that I’m thinking about today with the flush, I might’ve thrown it all up because my body had nothing in it for longer than it’s used to. I’m going to do it again tomorrow morning and see if I am okay through it, and if not (if my body just really can’t handle it anymore), then I’m going to cut down.