find faith

I think it’s found me. Since going to church more regurally I have “faith” in the back of my head. Things dont always seem so bleak and impossible anymore and I’m starting to let things go. The whole religion thing is still confusing and I’m not 100% sure what I believe in, but I do believe and I do have faith.

starting to see the good in people again (still irked by the bad though). Liking the idea of putting all my worries away but still unable to let go completely. I think if I felt I had some purpose, or calling maybe I could have a little more faith. Some days I’m so moved by the spirit I’m sure of lifes purposed but then you hear about bad news and you think, how could God allow such things? There must not be one. So what is the point of us being here? It’s the back and forth that’s weighing hard on me! I wish I could have that childlike belief again. I have truly accepted that my life is not my own though so I guess in that respect I have let go. I just wish that little amount of faith lightened my load a little more!

I just hope i dont lose what I have found like I normally do.