lose 35 pounds by Christmas 2007

As of today, I am down 18 pounds from my “restart” weight. I am exceptionally happy with this; it’s coming off slow, but it’s steady and it IS coming off.

I am in size 8s now pretty much across the board – of course every brand and store are different, so there are some that I can’t fit into, but I am wearing size 8 jeans and that’s the real benchmark, to me. I can still wear my 10s comfortably; 12s mostly fall off or are just too loose and flobby (yes, that’s my word, I made it up, so ha!) for comfort.

I’m not there, by a long shot, but I’m getting there, and I can actually begin to believe that I might BE there some day. I have been doing the workouts from Jillian Michaels’ website and loving them; it’s circuit training and it’s perfect for me, absolutely perfect. Like they were created just for me. I think I’ve found my niche. It makes me wish I could rejoin Curves but alas, the hours are still crap and the closest franchise has closed down. So I’ll stick with Jillian, it’s working very well.

I’m not sure what my goal is any more, the scale is bizarre – last time I was in a size 8 I weighed 135, this time I’m at 162, for heaven’s sake – but I know that I still want to tone and sculpt and there’s some fat that needs burned. So I’m just sort of taking it one week at a time right now. Right now it’s more about behavior – am I eating right nearly all the time, am I working out at least five times a week – than anything else. I figure if I keep the behaviors where they need to be, the rest will sort itself out.

So anyway…only 17 pounds to go on this 35 pound goal, which is no longer “by Christmas” but oh well. :-) Maybe by Christmas 2008! Slow but steady wins the race, and it’s very important to me that it stay off…

I am well on my way. Despite some shake-ups to my routine, which always throw me off, I am down 13.5 pounds from my “restart” weight, and I am actually able to squeeze into a size 8. Not all size 8s, but one or two. :-) I am mostly wearing 10s, and even some of those are tight, it really depends on the garment. But I did get into an 8 – in fact, yesterday I wore a size 8 dress that actually fits perfectly – and I hadn’t even dreamed of that.

Speaks a lot to the fact that I’m doing more body-reshaping than just weight loss. The scale may not be down as much as I’d like, but the inches have definitely come off.

I am going to be very happy with where I am at Christmas. It won’t be 35 pounds, there’s no way, but it will make me very happy. :-)

I am very pleased with my progress on this goal. As of this morning, I have lost 9.5 pounds, so I am well on my way to this. I am still not sure I can make the 35-pound goal, as that is a lot in not a very long time, but I am ecstatic with the progress I have made so far. And no matter how close I get to this goal or don’t get, any progress I make toward it is definitely a great thing!

I do feel confident that I can stick with the program and continue to lose. I am very motivated and committed right now, and am feeling really good about myself. I’m not looking too bad either, if I do say so myself! When I tried on dresses the other night, I was trying on 10s and they were fitting…so I am extremely happy!

4.5 pounds, baby! This has been an awesome week and I am completely psyched. I am determined to be 10 pounds down by Williamsburg and I am nearly halfway there, so I am Super-Happy Girl today!

The food is going great this week. I have started exercising slowly and am managing to be consistent with that, and it is completely paying off – the measurements are all down this week too, so I know it’s real, not just Scale Vapors.

This is going well. It’s amazing what you can do when you really work at it, I mean get off your butt and WORK at it!

Well, I think I am starting off well. Last night I didn’t do so well with the “going straight to bed” thing or the “not eating after work” thing…I didn’t eat before going to work because (a) I had picked up pizza due to soccer practice and my working, and (b) I didn’t have a lot of time. Nobody wants to choke down pizza in a hurry, particularly when pizza isn’t all that healthy anyway. And I wasn’t feeling very well, so I just didn’t eat.

I felt the pain at about 7:00, though, when my blood sugar bottomed out. Stupid. So I still didn’t eat on break, because by then I was nauseated…go figure.

So I ate when I got home, meaning I was up till after 11…and yeah, I ate pizza. So no benefit to this stupid chain of events at all.

However: I am drinking my water. I am doing my wall-ups every time I go to the bathroom (which is a LOT, since I’m drinking so much water!) and I am also doing squats. 20 of each, at each bathroom visit. Doesn’t sound like much, but it’s more of a workout than I’ve gotten in a long time. My muscles are sore! I forgot how good it feels to have well-earned muscle soreness…it helps you know you are making progress.

I don’t work tonight, so I will be able to implement the “not eating late” and “getting more sleep” things. I am very excited about this! Also, I will be tramping around in the woods helping my daughter pick up leaves for a project, so that will be a good little cardio event.

I am feeling very positive about this today despite last night. I think it is because I did implement the water and the “bathroom visit exercises”. I have already done 40 of each exercise today as well, and have 36 oz of water down – and it’s only 9:30. I like doing this one step at a time; I think (hope!) I am less likely to burn out and give up. I like giving myself permission to only change one thing at a time. I can succeed many times, that way, and success builds confidence, which leads to more success.

Stepped on the scale this morning and I’m down a pound and a half! Wish I could claim credit for it but I really can’t, it’s been very hit and miss. There’s no structure to my life right now.

I think that’s a BIG part of my problem with my second job; too much chaos and unpredictability. I NEED routine. If I knew exactly what nights I would be working and if it were the same all the time, I would be so much better off. If M. comes through with the project here I will insist on a structured schedule, it will be so much better.

But anyway…I’m working tonight and I brought something to eat for dinner beforehand if Ti doesn’t have dinner ready at home. I have got to really start kicking butt. I think the 165-pound reward might be a good incentive, I really want that tattoo. If I can convince Scott to pay for it, then I will have MAJOR motivation – now to translate that motivation into action. The exercise is the key – I have got to get active again. Maybe this weekend. No, I have to make it a definite plan – definitely this weekend.

I will commit to at least a half-hour exercise each day, in addition to my housework and my work schedule. Not too much to ask.

I am SO going to do this. I am really feeling that I am at a turning point. L. and I are racing to 165, having promised each other that we will each get a new tattoo (and final one!) when we get there. She wants to be there by November 1; I will settle for Christmas. That won’t get me to my 35 pound goal though. I’m okay with that, though – 165 would be a great weight for me. It sounds like a lot, but it’s 13 pounds under where I am now and I think I would be pretty happy with it. Then I can start at the beginning of the year working on the last 25, because I definitely don’t want to be under 140.

I feel pretty good about this. It helps that I’ve been so tired and stressed out that I don’t want to eat – I have had to force myself and my blood sugar has been all over the place. So I’m sticking with pretty healthy stuff.

I haven’t given up on this yet, though I am making no progress at all. Working two jobs is killing me.

It’s not that I can’t do it – I know that I could pack my food every day and eat the way I need to; I could make myself exercise on my days off from the second job, and probably could even force in some time on the days I work both jobs (that is most days, lately).

The problem is really mental. I am fatigued from constantly being on the job and I have almost no “down time”. My body feels very overtaxed already. I am getting too little sleep, which I know from experience is a weight-loss killer, and it feels terribly counter-productive to force myself to do more. However, I know that without exercise, I am not likely to lose an ounce.

I am also eating badly, mostly because I am just too tired to care. It is very difficult for me to keep the mindset I need in order to stick with the healthy lifestyle, when I am so drained and discouraged all the time.

I really need to cut back on my hours, but don’t feel that I can. It’s just a trying situation.

Nevertheless…as I said, I haven’t given up. I am still trying to make sure I get all the healthy stuff in, even on the days when I also get in a ton of bad stuff. I am still trying to walk when I can, though it is very sporadic and not often. And I still have the goal. I know it will only get harder as Christmas approaches, but I am going to try. Nothing ventured, nothing gained, and if I don’t make it, it’s not like I don’t get to keep trying. I won’t get ejected from the game for poor performance. :-)

Okay, it’s time to quit screwing around. I am giving myself a time limit for this because otherwise I am never going to do it.

I have the tools, I know what I need to do – it’s worked, for crying out loud – and I am going to start doing it. It is time for me to stop being lazy and self-indulgent and just do what needs to be done.

To meet this goal, I will need to lose an average of 1.3 pounds per week. That is completely do-able. Of course there will be weeks I won’t lose, but I am hoping there will also be weeks when I will lose more, so it should even out.

No more snacking and doing what I want…no more sitting around making excuses. It is time to step up to the plate and take control of everything in my life that I have let slide…money, weight, responsbilities around the house, you name it.

This is my wake up call to myself.

Well, I haven’t weighed myself since I’ve been back in the swing of things, but I am feeling really good about how I’ve been doing. I have been eating really well and I haven’t skipped a planned night of exercise yet. I did take Sunday off except for yoga, but that was my planned day off so that’s okay. And I ate right ALL WEEKEND, which is a huge battle for me! This weekend is Mother’s Day weekend, so that may be a little tough, but I have faith that I can do it. I really want to see the rest of this weight gone by the end of the summer. There’s no reason I shouldn’t be able to do it if I really work at it, so I’m really working at it.

It’s actually probably more like 30 pounds, but oh well.