SunriseOverSea in Brighton and Hove is doing 19 things including…

stop fancying my housemate

1 cheer

 

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SunriseOverSea has written 6 entries about this goal

Closure

In the end, all I had to do was move out, get on with my life for two years, then fall in love with somone else.

Simple :P



Update

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH

I’m excommunicating my brain.



Resolution...?

It’s often nice to think that, even though you KNOW something won’t work out, that someone else wants it too. After a generally shitty couple of weeks (letting both myself and her down), I’m pretty much convinved that she isn’t the least be attracted to me. I’m taking everything far too seriously now, I can barely look at her without being consumed by jelously. That’s a really, really bad state to be in. It’s damaging our friendship, and I think she’s becoming increasingly uncomfortable around the house. Maybe nothing too heavy or specific, but just general vibes.

I’m trying, really trying, to keep her out of my mind. Everything has blown up to ludicrous proportions, and I’m not coping well. Give me strength.

I just hope she doesn’t end up getting hurt over this.

I think she’s started smoking. That makes me angry, disappointed, and upset. I have no right to feel any of the above. So what now?



Solutions

Things aren’t really going too well this end. She’s still being impossibly sweet and lovely, and is always being nice to me. But I’m only becoming more and more convinced that it just wouldn’t work out between us.

So, I figure there’s two solutions. Maybe it’s the same for any relationship. Either:
a) Find someone else to dream about (tricky)
b) Find some way to absolutley hate her (also tricky, i can’t say a bad thing about her)
c) Make her really, really hate me and try to kill me. (A bit extremist)

I’m not sure what to do, really. I guess I’ll just keep going to bed lonely each night, and waiting for one of her smiles to see me through the day.



Christmas!

Well, she’s away for Christmas now, won’t see her for.. best part of a month. It should be good for me, hopefully I can get her out of my head! It’s silly and annoying!

However, my heart nearly leapt of my chest the other morning. I opened the fridge door, the day after she left, and there was one particular white, clean, empty fridge shelf starting innocently back at me. It was one of the saddest things I’ve seen for quite a while.



My Story

My housemate moved in with me about 3 months ago. It was almost inevitable, really. I’ve been lonley a while now, and in moves this pretty young 18 year old girl. And I could cope with it all fine, execpt that she is so utterly LOVELY! She’s an absolute joy in my life, smiles whenever she sees me, and is full of happiness and good energy.

I don’t want to start anything, because it’s not fair on the rest of the house. Besides, I couldn’t keep a lovely girl like her happy for very long, and it would end badly. Even so, we’ve been spending a lot of time together. Sometimes, when she comes into my room and talks to me until 1am, I think that she might feel exactly the same.

Oh, drama!



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