spread happiness

I’m aloof when it comes to men on nights out at the best of times, any whiff of a pack mentality is a total turn off for me. But tonight I hit a new high/low! I felt like I was an alien observer of crappy bars in the 21st century.

Tonight, I went for some drinks in a bar with 2 girlfriends from work. It was nice catching up… But then seeing as it was Friday night the bar we were in was packed with guys and the requisite number of perma tan girls in way too slutty dresses. This is hard describe, as without really knowing me it will be hard to understand how deeply I find this whole situation offensive.

Is this the disuptopia to come? I’m fed up. I find it hard to talk to them no matter how nice they come across as their intent is clearly motivated by sex. Not necessarily a bad thing if I trusted them.

I’m more open minded than I had once reckoned, will try anything and everything. But packs of guys that show no sense of individuality between them, no. To them I could be any Sarah, Jane , Paula or whoever. Me as a person is not of value, or it certainly doesn’t seem to be.

Oh god I struggled with this when I was 18 and was often thought of as some kind of cock tease. But now ten years on maybe I’m being rude, I’m not a bitch, but I just feel totally uncomfortable with the situation.

The friends I was with were angry with me that I didn’t join them in the club with the group of guys. And tbh these weren’t young guys, these were guys in their 30’s/ 40’s chancing their luck with some pretty girls.

I guess its what I wrote last night that it just feels fake and mediocre to chat to them if there’s no connection. They would be better off chatting to a different girl and I would be better off at home.

I can happily be a party girl like the best of them but I have to feel safe and there’s an atmosphere where I can truly be me! In that kind of place, its fine to talk to anyone, no pressure to sleep with them and so, so much easier to spread genuine happiness.

I didn’t spread much happiness tonight.

Never has a silly facebook quiz brought me this much joy.

Jenny completed the quiz “What Decade Fits Your Personality Best?” with the result 1930’s.
You are strong and determined and have what it takes to get through life’s storms. You are very helpful to those around you—be it your friends, your family, or even a neighbor in need. You are a great leader and strong-willed person, and take challenges as a way to better yourself…But you also have a deep sense of warmth and nurturing for those you care about. You are well-rounded and tough because you have to be. You aren’t a “diva” but rather a humble person with admirable character. With more hard-working, quality like you, this world would be a much better place. By being able to turn a little into a lot, you know how to make life enjoyable even if it’s just through the little things.

Bask in that for a moment – pure happiness, with no tests and nothing to prove. Imagine it, luxuriate in it. Don’t fight it. Don’t allow your mind to sully or bismich it. Stay with it. Pure happiness. Not a smidgeon of unhappiness in the mix. Imagine it. Feel it. That’s good. You just experienced pure happiness. Not many can make such a claim.

From PURE by Barefoot Doctor.

No act of kindness no matter how small is ever wasted – Aesop

There is no need to defer happiness. I have been working on this one. Learning to be happy and content with being right where I am supposed to be. Enjoying the feeling of trusting myself to make the right choices.

Its difficult to spread happiness if you are not happpy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jIDTyiVMG7k&feature=related

This guy is awesome!

I work in a care home looking after elderly folk. My role is to organise the activities within the home. I believe passionately life is for living and no matter how long we have left it is precious and we can make the most of it.

I would love spreading happiness to be part of everyones job description no matter what your role is. If you can touch someone’s heart it’s a magic momentand should be treasured.

I’m thankful to all the people who have brought me happiness over the years and would love to be able to spread it to others.

I am thinking how I can achieve this goal and how i can make it measureable.