Joyfully Pray For Myself And Others

It’s nice to be reminded that prayer matters. That my role in God’s plan matters. It reminds me why He hasn’t made our lives perfect with no ups or downs, no strife, no learning opportunities or chances to depend more fully upon Him. Life is not perfect. It is horrible sometimes. But He asks me to pray and I feel quite happy when I know those good, intentional thoughts go off into the ether. I feel empowered and humble at the same time.

...this lately.
Perhaps that’s why I feel like such a curmudgeon.

...see page 1 of newest journal.

Thx,
Leanne

Prayed for Esther and it was one of those easy prayers, that felt like they were already written out on the clouds or something… just waiting for someone to say the words. I guess in Chrisianese that would be called “praying IN the Spirit”. Not to mock. Really, it definitely felt Spirit-led (to use more Christian jargon).

Anyways, glad that it was easy and that it made me feel better and I hope it made her feel better too.

Now…

onto more praying ;)
:D

for Z’s eyeball muscle, or whatever it is, returning to normal.
for his plaque buildup disappearing.
for his symptoms receding.
for his attitude.
for his life regaining balance.
for his increasing social circle.
for his break from bad habits and unhelpful, unloving people.
for communication.
for good music.
for opportunities.
for c & m.
for baby z.
for a healthy family.
for a stabler financial situation.

1. Alpha folks searching for answers….
2. the dilemma of when to have kids…
3. job opportunities…
4. z’s mom…
5. grandma’s radiation treatments…
6. peace of mind…

-found community where I was least expecting it.
-saw the heart of people that I judged on the outside, but through their honesty with eachother and the Lord came to feel affinity and love for them in mere seconds.
-it felt great to be moved to tears by the Glory of God, the power and majesty of His work in ordinary people, to be invited into caring for them, lifting up broken hearts, failing marriages, raw and sore emotions. To BE COMMUNITY.
-just. such. a blessing.

and it’s starting to freak me out.
stop stop stop
GO TO BED.
NOW.

last night was able to joyfully lay back in a comfy chair during the performance and to pray for God’s Spirit to be present, to be active, to be working through Mark’s hands, to be creating something beautiful and different and God Breathed. it was very peaceful and rewarding. God was present. I was aware of Him. I am so thankful.

i know that God “knows the groanings of my heart” which is cool… yaaaa, but, i feel inadequate, i feel tongue-tied, i feel feeble not knowing what to say on the situation of my sister... i am not comfortable not having an answer!

please, i need prayer for the words – REAL WORDS not trite, overused, overly-obvious phrases of “everything will work out in the end”. i need to pray with INTENTION and i need to rest and WAIT. and then to pray again and rest and wait. and TALK with the Creator Of The Universe (as my friend likes to say) and maybe then, i will have some peace about the crappiness of this world.

Lord, please make me an instrument for change in this world. please give me the strength to keep putting one foot in front of the other.