be a succulent wild woman

Look up to them, they are your role models! The people we hang out with rub off on us a little, so I think always it’s important to have good friends and role models.

This summer I re-united with one of my best friends from High School, we became best friends again! So many things have changed since high school for sure, one is how strong, fearless feminist and fabulous my friend is!

I got a lot from her. She taught me how to flirt and joke around with people and how to go for what I want without shying away. I taught her that all women are princesses, yet most men are mere surfs haha! The one that is a prince, he will find your pea. My friend got me to go a little more wild and not care what anyone else thinks! She taught me there is nothing to fear about getting a year older, that quite contrary, every year holds even more than the next and we just get better with age. I feel like life is my oyester, it’s just beginning!! Thanks to my one of a kind friend Cassie.

I think I’ll get the chance to let my succulent wild woman out when I’m camping.

1. I’ve never been
2. the area we are camping has over 30 water falls
3. I’ve vowed to actually go the weekend without a hot shower (will be forced to do so anyway) The waterfall = my shower!
4. Late night tent activites include wine drinking, story hour (after wine, best stories told when slightly intoxicated), and naked dancing lol. (Hopefully there won’t be kids or bears)
5. For someone who can’t even handle a domestic stove, we will be cooking dinner (leaves, twigs, and ramen noodles) on the campfire lol. Oh gross.

I think I’ll come back to civilization a whole new woman.

I tend to complain about my self esteem issues but I go on such a roller coaster from being confident and feeling fabulous to feeling like crap de crap.

Men ruin my self esteem, and porn does that also.

I was happy until I stumbled upon these so called erotic images at deviant art of girls bending over showing their ms. lucys with peircings down there. Okay I felt soo sooooo ugly and unsucculent. Whatever confidence I had is now gone.

And the thing with men – men always compare me to other girls. I always here “You be hotter with long hair… straight hair… a tan” all that, and they always point out hot girls in front of me, talk to me about how it would be hot if I was at least bisexual, I shoudl go to a strip club to see if I’m attracted to the girls (I know I won’t be I know I will really just be comparing myself to them, and feel like I want to go home and kill myself)

Blahhh so much self-drama. I don’t like this way I think about myself. I think my poor self image is all because of men. Are they all assholes or am I just an asshole magnet?

Back in the day before boyfriends and dating and sex, I was never anything less than fabulous and content with myself and always knew I was beautiful.

I think I want all men to stop talking to me lol. Maybe I could just use them for their bodies and not have them open their mouths. haha j.k

I went Latin Dancing with my friend and his friend’s from work and I was the only girl there!!! That made me very nervous at first and mad, but then it was like more men for me!! It was quite exhausting, every guy wanted to dance with me and teach them how to dance so I took turns spinning the boys around the dance floor.

This was a very shady night club – called ‘Las Vegas Bailamos’ with the most ecclectic mix of music ever. They played Reggeton, then cumbia, then trance music, the mexican mariachi, then monster love ballads from the 80’s.

I was blown away by Justin’s friend Wilson who just moved here from Honduras who knew every word to these love songs hehehehe!!!! We were all sitting around singing along.

Then four guys inquired my contact information. I told them -‘next time we go latin dancing’. What is a graceful way to refuse giving your number out I wonder??

It was also the first time I had gone dancing in pants. (too cold for a dress) and despite me not being able to pull off my flowing skirt spinning and tossing about tricks, I feel like I never moved better!!!

Was there ever someone who wanted to change you – to mold you into what they wanted?

It is hurtful! Somethings recently that I have dealth with in my personal life have been like an attack on my ‘womanhood’. I just have to say, the only person who can change me is me. How dare anyone else try!

“Maybe some women aren’t meant to be tamed. Maybe they just need to run free til they find someone just as wild to run with them.” – Carrie Bradshaw