write and perform silly songs, make loads of money and fly around in a diamond-encrusted spaceship called the SoaP Dragon with my fellow Snakes on a Plane bandmates

is asking people to vote for the oddest book title ever

i just received a mail from a friend requesting votes for the contribution that won her a bottle of vintage champagne in 1994 (Highlights in the History of Concrete), but ended up being led astray by marmalade (The Book of Marmalade: Its Antecedents, Its History and Its Role in the World Today). that’s definitely one for the wish list.

_{tomorrow i’m going to vote for Oral Sadism and the Vegetarian Personality.}

involving a chocolatelabrador

watch out for watering cans, team!
_{i don’t want to be alarmist, but the watering cans may contain killer jellyfish or even toxic jelly. perhaps the watering can is the enemy shed!}

Hey ho, the Ish is back.
Which swish Ish? It’s Agent Ish!
Hey ho! Our Agent Ish is back.
Wake up you sleepy head
Rub your eyes, get out of bed.
Wake up, our Agent Ish is back.
She’s been for a holiday,
Away – away – away.
Yo-ho, let’s flap about and sing and eat chocolate and fly around in the SoapDragon and do all sorts of exciting things.
Hey ho the merry-oh, sing it high, sing it low.
Let them know our Agent Ish is back!

To be sung with Peter, Paul and Mary harmonies, fervently.

Ish, our friend and bandmate
Lived by the lake
And every day she’d cheer us
And our day she would make

All the 43 thingers
Loved to read her thoughts
About family, writing, doing new things
And the fancy underwear she’d bought

Ish, the Ziida agent
Looked out for the BM crew
She’d rouse, inspire, advise us
And do some rowing too

Together we would space-travel
On a dragon-ship with diamond crust
Doing flappy one-armed dances
In a space-bonnet was a must

Weird man Morten Harket
Would try our computers to crish
Pirate gangs would pack their bags
But nothing flustered Ish

Ish, our inspiration
Looked after Q
And H and Bubs and Mouse and mum
Not to mention DH too

Sometimes life’s a bastard
And it’s time to take a break
Sometimes even space travel
Can’t stop the dull heart ache

One grey day it happened
Ish’s entries were no more
And all the SoaP band members
They ceased their fearless roar

Their heads were bent in sorrow
Silvie’s house filled with rain
How could things go on now?
43things would never be the same

Without their Muskoka friend
Life would lose its spark
But we’ll try to keep the faith, Ish
And back to your words we’ll hark

Oh, Ish, our much missed woman
Please feel our loving vibes
We’ll keep your seat in the SoaPdragon warm
And hope we can soon resubscribe!

for space dancing and inspired use of irons, please check out Raumpatrouille Orion here
and here=

i wonder if we should try to arrange a show with Rezillos who appear still to be going strong. their songs address the same urgent themes as ours.

you can’t hear the lyrics very well, but if you check them here i think you’ll find they are very pertinent indeed.

_{edit: whoops, just corrected the first link}

in primary school i was in a band called The Fruitful Days. we enjoyed brief success with our brilliant parodies of top pop songs. Abba’s Poooper Scooper to name just one. awards included a certificate for “spontaneous entertainment” during the school trip to scotland.

after an acrimonious split, i went on to form The Molers. again, social criticism was the order of the day, with songs based on Ant Music (we are the molers, we dig holers, we are the molers) and Duran Duran’s Planet Earth (look now, look all around, there’s now sign of moles. i dug a hole last night. a great big ho-oooooole. this is planet moles. dig dig dig dig dig dig dig dig. we like digging holes.)

why do i mention this? woke up this morning with a Fruitful Days’ lyric in my head. i think it was our first song, based on those Eurovision heroes, Bucks Fizz, and the wonderful Making Your Mind Up, from the days when skirt-related incidents were still innovative and cheeky. i can only remember two lines, and don’t even know what the song was about (but i can remember sharon legg’s dance move). it seems to be fomenting some kind of anti-Boggles movement. anyway those two lines may serve as inspiration as we race through space. they are:

Don’t let your television blow up your behind.Trust your television. Don’t let radio change your mind.

of stine as queen of the night accounts singing the mozart aria. that would surely be one for the poodle choir. and what is the aria=
about? The wrath of Hell boils in my heart !!!

here
are the english lyrics. anyone other than a Ziida agent would have been stumped. but clearly, Sarastro is code for spreadsheets! stine is an a nighttime mission, getting the maids of oslo to kill their spreadsheets.

well, i can only applaud that. good job stine, keep it up.