be happy

Being Alone
A Relationship With Self

The most important relationship we have in our lives is with our selves. And even though we are the only ones who are present at every moment of our lives—from birth onward—this relationship can be the most difficult one to cultivate. This may be because society places such emphasis on the importance of being in a romantic partnership, even teaching us to set aside our own needs for the needs of another. Until we know ourselves, however, we cannot possibly choose the right relationship to support our mutual growth toward our highest potential. By allowing ourselves to be comfortable with being alone, we can become the people with whom we want to have a relationship.

Perhaps at no other time in history has it been possible for people to survive, and even thrive, while living alone. We can now support ourselves financially, socially, and emotionally without needing a spouse for survival in any of these realms. With this freedom, we can pursue our own interests and create fulfilling partnerships with friends, business partners, creative cohorts, and neighbors. Once we’ve satisfied our needs and created our support system, a mate then becomes someone with whom we can share the bounty of all we’ve created and the beauty we’ve discovered within ourselves.

As we move away from tradition and fall into more natural cycles of being in the world today, we may find that there are times where being alone nourishes us and other periods in which a partnership is best for our growth. We may need to learn to create spaces to be alone within relationships. When we can shift our expectations of our relationships with ourselves and others to opportunities for discovery, we open ourselves to forge new paths and encounter uncharted territory. Being willing to know and love ourselves, and to find what truly makes us feel deeply and strongly, gives us the advantage of being able to attract and choose the right people with whom to share ourselves, whether those relationships fall into recognizable roles or not. Choosing to enjoy being alone allows us to fully explore our most important relationship—the one with our true selves.

_{http://www.dailyom.com}

“Life is like riding a bicycle:
To keep balance you must keep moving”

—Albert Einstein, in a letter to his son Edward, February 5, 1930.

_{From Walter Isaacson’s Einstein: His Life & Universe}

I just got a call from my favorite Indian restaurant to let me know I won a lunch for 10 people!! I’d dropped of my business card last month, but I’m in shock—I never win anything. Me so happy! :D

I don’t know why I keep forgetting that happiness is something I have to cultivate, not something that I put on in the morning like socks. So here we go once again:

• The sun, the wind, the bright blue sky, and when all of them combine to form an absolutely gorgeous day.
• Swimming & water.
• Finding snippets of wisdom in a book that I otherwise despise.
• Getting back to excercising routines and feeling much better.
• A renewed sense of direction & serene motivation.

I had a really good day. It’s good to write about being already happy instead of the things that are getting in the way of me & happiness—not that I’m such a prolific 43T writer, but still.

Today, I was very happy to be proved wrong, very wrong indeed. I was expecting the doctor’s office to charge me ridiculous amounts of money for unnecessary things they normally charge insurance companies for. Instead, the doctor, a tall man who radiated humanity, a ready warm smile and a full head of white hair, examined my arm, did a full set of x-rays and showed me all the physical therapy exercises that aren’t covered by my insurance for a discounted grand total of $100.

I came home to watch Oscar Wilde’s film adaptation of his hilarious play The Importance of Being Earnest, laughing, smiling, all the while being reminded of how much I enjoy the English language, how fortunate I am to have a proclivity for words after seeing and hearing other immigrants every day for whom learning it is a struggle and often an insurmountable obstacle.

It feels good to stop sometimes and say to yourself “you know, today was a really good day, a happy day”.

the hyacinth plant I got as a secret valentine gift at the office.

Its aroma is the most wonderfully sweet & fragrant you can imagine. It is subtle but strong, enticing but tranquil, sensuously seducing… I am sitting on the opposite side of the house where the plant is and I can smell I from here.

And I love the flower-inspired name for girls in Spanish, Jacinta :)

_{This was passed down to me from my grandfather who remains active in AA even after his 30 years of sobriety. The wisdom of these words is universal, and independent of one’s status as addict. We all have drugs of choice: feelings, patterns, behaviors. Every time I stumble upon this old piece of paper, which is a photocopy of a copy of a copy, I can’t help but realize my potential, to feel empowered and a great sense of tranquility that everything and anything is surmountable with the right dose of intelligence and will.}

Just for today, I will be happy. This assumes as true what Abraham Lincoln said: “Most folks are as happy as they make up their minds to be.” Happiness comes from the inside, it is not an external matter.

Just for today, I will adjust myself to what is and not try to adjust everything to my own desires. I will accept my family, my business, my luck as it comes, and fit myself to it.

Just for today, I will care for my body. I will exercise it, tend to it, feed it; I will not abuse it or abandon it so that it may be an instrument to my purpose.

Just for today, I will strengthen my spirit. I will learn something useful. I will not be a mental loafer. I will read something that requires effort, thought, and concentration.

Just for today, I will exercise my soul in three ways: I will do good onto someone unbeknown to him/her; I will do at least two things I don’t want to do, just for exercise.

Just for today, I will be agreeable. I will look as best as I can, dress becomingly, talk low, act courteously, criticize not one bit, not find fault with anything, and not try to improve or regulate anybody except myself.

Just for today, I will live through this day only, and not tackle my whole life problem at once. I can do something for twelve hours that would appall me if I felt that I had to keep it up for a lifetime.

Just for today, I will have a program. I may not follow it exactly, but I will have it. I will save myself from two pests: hastiness and indecision.

Just for today, I will have a quiet half hour all by myself and relax. During this half hour, some time, I will try to get a better perspective of my life.

Just for today, I will not be afraid. Especially I will not be afraid to be happy, to enjoy what is beautiful, and to love and to believe that I am loved.

Creating a Fork in the Road
New Year, New Start

To many, the coming of a new year represents an opportunity to begin again. It is a time to step off of dead-end paths in order to create a fork in the road, disassociating from the old, and aligning with fresh possibilities. Harnessing the power of this transformative energy is a matter of truly believing that resolutions can conquer past patterns. If we believe we are capable of changing our lives, we are more apt to believe that we are capable of leaving our mistakes behind. Our dedication, which might otherwise falter, is buoyed by hope. Thus, the beginning of the new year is traditionally a popular time to tackle difficult tasks such as quitting smoking, losing weight, or fulfilling worldly ambitions. But the transition from year to year can also be an opportune occasion to pursue emotional, spiritual, and intellectual growth because we no longer feel burdened by regret and disappointment.

Whatever your reality, it is within your power to create the fork that allows you to walk a more conscious, grounded path. Viewing the start of the coming year as a time of rebirth allows you to focus on what you want to accomplish in the coming weeks, months, and years. Because you are a new person—in other words, a clean slate—you are free to immerse yourself in new experiences with impunity. If you feel a need to reconnect with your spirituality, consider taking up yoga, meditation, or another discipline that challenges both your mental and physical selves. Fill your newly-cleansed mind with stimulating knowledge, poignant wisdom, and useful skills. Clearing your home or workspace of clutter can improve the flow of energy in your life, giving you the momentum you need to stay true to your resolutions. And beginning a fresh journal can be a wonderful way to celebrate these developing aspects of your life.

In the ancient Babylonian, Chinese, and Celtic traditions, the period marking the transition from the old year to the new was viewed as a struggle between chaos and order, in which order always prevailed. Your belief that you, too, can banish chaos and integrate your dreams, desires, and goals more fully into your life will give you the determination and fortitude to change your life for the better.

_{http://www.dailyom.com}

Photo Credit cormack13

¿Qué es poesía? dices mientras clavas
en mi pupila tu pupila azul.
¿Qué es poesía? ¿Y tú me lo preguntas?
Poesía… eres tú.

—Gustavo Adolfo Bécquer

• NATURE
• Taking the small roadtrip to Hobe Sound, and not having to drive more than 15 minutes in my daily commute.
• Kayaking.
• The weather cooperating with me and avoiding getting stuck on a very nasty storm in a kayak.
• Florida ecosystems.
• Pushing myself physically.
• Smiles, esp. strangers who smile, I love them for doing that.
• Wind that goes through the skin and cleanses the soul.
• Clarity & Perspective.