Take pictures of examples of spelling and punctuation so horrible that they make me feel a bit sick, and post them on here for other language geeks to gawp at.

I bloody love Dan Savage, not just for the amazingly astute and hilariously delivered sex advice available on his podcast and advice column, but for his vicious inability to let it lie when someone with a poor grasp of grammar and spelling gets in touch. To wit the third letter on this week’s column.

“I’m a bi 18 year old female. I can’t cum during sex, I never have. Boys or girls it doesnt matter. I can get off by myself but with other people its just uncomfterable. Vagional penatration feels good but head or finger fucking is Not fun. I thought that it was just the people I was sleeping with. You know, age and a small town bla bla bla. I’m off to collage now and in a much biger city and nothing is better.”

Dan’s answer.

“Off to collage, are we?

Here’s something you may not know about vaginal penetration (besides how to spell “vaginal” and “penetration”) because it’s not something that’s typically covered in small-town high-school sex-ed classes: You can touch yourself during vaginal intercourse. Whatever you’re doing that’s getting you off when you’re alone, ICC, do that thing—touch yourself that way—whenever a sex partner is penistrating you vaginotionally.“

And that, my friends, is why I love Dan Savage.

Let’s have a barbacue!

I snapped this in a seaside pub restaurant where we were having a family meal. I kept having to run over and try to take sneaky photos. Every time I look at this pic I spot something else.

• Let’s start off gently by noting that there’s an apostrophe missing from “chefs”. But this is par for the course now. Ready?
• Pan-seared scollops? ScOllops? Not… scallops?
• Horseraddish with two ds?
• I guess there’s an accent missing from “soufflé”. But frankly that’s small fry next to…
• ..grilled venison lion?! Raaaargh!
• ..and redcurrent jus?! Some kind of electric shock?
• ..and salad leavs?
• ..and new potatos?

Awesome. There was also a second menu board upon which they had spelled “pigeon” as “pigion”. Brilliant.

Hm. Not holy enough to spell “religious” correctly though.

Found on Digg. I think this speaks for itself.

Introducing your new great value Washington Street Shuttle fare’s what?

I don’t remember taking this, but from what I can see, it looks like the leaflet says “Introducing our new great value Washington Street Shuttle fare’s Washington Street Shuttle”. How meta.

..it sells foods that don’t even exist.

..apostrophe missin!

I’ve been to South Shields though.

It that like “resident”?