Make 2008 my best year yet

Maybe it’s because I spent 20 years of my life going to school (of some sort), and now I have 4 school-aged kids. But it has always seemed to me that my “years” move more naturally from September to September, than from January to January. The autumn always signals, for me, a new beginning, when school starts, clubs start, many things restart after a summer hiatus. And the summer is always a good time for me to wind down, finish up old projects, and reflect and make plans for the fall.

Once again, as I’m relaxing through the first weeks of July, I’m realizing that lots of changes and new starts are awaiting me this fall, things that shuffle around and update my current BYY goals.

So I’ve decided to start a new goal, to make Sept 08 to Sept 09 my best year yet. I’ll see how that goes, and if that timing suits me better. It gives me a few weeks to reflect on my life and prepare for a new start at the end of summer.

I’m really looking forward to summer. Lots of fresh fruit and vegetables, time at the lake, good weather and sunshine… it’s the easiest time of the year to start up good eating and exercise habits.

(1) Mindful eating

• Big subgoal: to lose 10 pounds by September 1st. Track my food consumption daily!
• Vary my grains, eat lots of whole grains.
• Eat lots of fruits and veg every day
• Reduce dairy to just fat-free yogurt and a little low-fat cheese; replace milk with almond milk
• Eat more fish and vegetarian meals, and reduce other meat portions to “a pack of cards” size 2 or 3 times a week.

(2) Exercise

• Do physiotherapy exercises daily
• See physiotherapist about strength training
• Start a walking program
• Take advantage of swimming, rowing and kayaking while at the lake!
• Work on yoga and pilates at home, hopefully with DH!

(3) Writing

• Write morning pages daily through July and August (have already bought a book for this purpose)
• Think about new project DH and I have discussed
• Dig up notes for romance novel; use speech-to-text software to dictate a first draft

(4) Decluttering & decorating

• during the times we’re in the city, work on sorting through the rest of Mom’s things, and emptying out that section of the basement.
• try to get the kids’ bedrooms painted this summer.

(5) Keeping my marriage healthy

• work on being a good friend to my husband
• say what I’m thinking instead of brooding about it
• try to have weekly business meeting, to plan meals, divvy up work, set weekly goals, etc.

I’m kind of off-track. But I’m reviewing my goals now to get myself back in the groove for the remainder of the month. I don’t want to fall into the mentality of “well, I fell off the wagon, so I may as well call the whole month a loss”. I think that’s my most self-defeating behaviour. I want to consider every step forward as a step toward a better me, and not get so stressed about the slip-ups.

(1) Mindful eating

• Haven’t done a good job of tracking my food in FitDay. I will restart with that today. But I am down 2 pounds since the beginning of the month, so that’s a good sign.

• Fish 3/5; Meat 5/15; Wheat 2/20. Can still make my meat and fish goals; and aim to do the best I can with the wheat one.

(2) Physical Fitness

• other than physio exercises, haven’t done anything else. Plan for yoga class on Thurs?

(3)Stress management

• Did make a list of things stressing me out. Need to move on to the “how to handle them” part
• The other day, when I felt the need to stress eat, I stuffed myself with yogurt and blueberries.

(4) Decluttering

• This is sort of on hold until DH finishes work at the end of the month. Then I hope we’ll be able to work on it together.

(5) Writing

DH did indeed install some speech-to-text software on my laptop, and it works pretty well. My only issue: I feel a sort of performance anxiety when I use it. First of all, there has to be absolutely no one else around. And second, even then, as soon as I start recording, I freeze up a bit and have a hard time thinking of what to say. I should start by jotting some rough notes to work from, and then try to relax more.

(1) Mindful eating

• Track eating faithfully in FitDay – I think this really helps keep me on track and think seriously about what I’m putting into my mouth. Aim for 1600 calories.

• For 30 days of June, have at least 15 days in which I don’t eat meat; at least 5 days in which I have fish; at least 20 days when I don’t have wheat.

(2) Physical fitness

• do physio exercises faithfully
• consult physiotherapist on June 3rd about what exercises to return to, and set up a schedule
• put together a series of stretches to do before bed

(3) Stress management

• make a list of the things that are stressing me out, and action list of how to address each of them.
• don’t stress eat: that only makes me feel worse

(4) Decluttering and organizing

• Inventory the things I want to get rid of: specifically, things that need to be sold, advertised, appraised etc, and aren’t as easy to get rid of as things that get put in Good Will.

(5) Writing

• Get DH to install voice-to-text software on laptop, to see if this works for dictating first drafts, relieving the burden of typing.

(1) Mindful eating
I started out with good intentions. Kind of fell off the wagon though, with all this back and shoulder trouble. I was trying to substitute the gym for eating as a stress resolver, and when I couldn’t go to the gym, I kind of fell back on eating. Still. I have made a point of eating more vegetarian meals this month. I have found myself looking at my plate and thinking, “I’m already full. I don’t have to finish this.” I’ve made myself go to bed instead of staying up and eating (esp knowing that as the night wears on, I become more likely to eat junk). And I have a new treat food: low-fat yogurt and berries. So, while I didn’t do as well as I would have liked, I think I have made some progress in improving long-term eating habits and awareness.

(2)Physical activity.

This was a write-off. Had to give up on the weights completely, since for a little while I could barely lift a teapot. Even yoga wasn’t possible, because my arms, wrists, shoulders couldn’t take sun salutations.

On the plus side, I’ve seen a massage therapist, a chiropractor and a physiotherapist, and feel good that my repetitive strain issues are being addressed. I have exercises to do for back and shoulders, and hope this will be the beginning of returning to my weight routine. I’ve also corrected my posture at the computer, and am trying to remember to do a series of daily stretches for post-computer use. I consider myself on the road to recovery.

(3) Stress management

Didn’t do very well on this either! That is, I didn’t actively try to meditate, or to get up earlier, as I’d planned. Nevertheless, seeing the massage therapist was good for alleviating some stress and discomfort. And despite my misgivings about allowing chiro guy to give me an adjustment, I have to admit that for the first time in about 2 years, that achey spot behind my shoulder blade doesn’t ache anymore. That’s been a huge physical relief, and in itself has probably gone a long way to making me feel better.

(4) Decluttering and organizing

We did get rid of our unwanted books, both at home and at the cottage. And I reorganized my desk, and evicted some excess furniture that was crowding the front room. I also cleaned out a whack of Mouse’s old clothes. So, again, some progress made.

(5) Write

Nada. Well, after all, I pretty much gave up using the computer earlier this month when I found I couldn’t type without pain. DH has purchased some voice-to-text software, and I’m going to try it out: moving forward, maybe I’ll be able to dictate first drafts of my work, which would cut back some of the typing.

I did register to attend a writer’s conference at the end of September, so I’m hoping that will motivate me to draft something new over the summer!

Okay then, summary: had kind of a downer month, but have finished on an up beat, and feeling that the problems that weighed me down this month are being resolved. On to June!

(1) Mindful eating

• Continue mindful eating.
• Vegetarian meals at least 2x week; fish 2x week. Lots of f&v. Seriously reduced intake of wheat products.

(2) Physical activity

• weights 2-3x week
• row 2-3x week
• yoga 2-3x week
• jump rope/walk daily

(3) Stress management

• meditate
• avoid sitting around brooding: get busy and do something
• get up a little earlier, so mornings are less rushed

(4) Decluttering and organizing

• continue on course to reduce possessions by 50%
• shed
• filing cabinet
• craft cupboard
• go through some more of Mom’s boxes

(5) Writing

• signed up to attend a conference for romance writers this fall; hoping this will motivate me to write a manuscript this summer
• blog

(1) Mindful eating

• Continue eating in a way that will result in a body that makes me feel confident, attractive, healthy and energized.
• Count calories: aim to lose another 5 pounds by the end of April

(2) Physical activity

• row 3 times a week
• do weight routine 2-3 times a week
• play tennis with DH at least 1x week
• begin power walking as soon as weather permits

(3) Stress management

• don’t procrastinate about things I have to do (like make calls or appts) since having them hang over my head is stressful. Just do them, and cross them off my list
• don’t bottle up my feelings: talk about them with DH
• accept that there are some things I can’t fix, esp in other people’s lives
• don’t be guilted into doing things I don’t want to do

(4) Decluttering and organizing

• continue to read Organizing book
• Fill a green garbage bag with stuff to give away each week in April

(5) Writing

• finish manuscript revisions and send out by end of first week in April
• begin drafting plot for next book
• write 3 days a week, minimum

Okay, I know it’s already halfway through the month, but I’m finally feeling back in the saddle.

(1) Health:

• -Back on track for delicate eating, tracking my daily foods, and avoiding bread products (because I don’t need to carry a loaf around my waistline!)- going really well. I’m happy with the increased variety in my diet, and I’m enjoying and feeling good about what I’m eating
• -mini-goal: to lose 5 pounds by April- yay!

(2) Physical Activity:

• continue tennis with DH
• row 5/7 days a week (in the morning is most efficient)
• -my women and weights class ends next Monday: after that, book a personal trainer session to help me set up an ongoing routine that suits my goals and fits in my knee exercises!- classes done and training sessions booked
• dependent on when the snow melts: start power walking

(3) Stress Management:

• don’t let things become an issue (if there’s a job weighing on my mind, JUST DO IT!), say no to tasks I don’t want to do, and don’t be guilted into over-committing myself
• if things are bothering me, talk about them to DH and/or post about them on 43T
• DO NOT stress eat, because that just makes me feel worse. Or at least, splurge on some imported fruit! been doing pretty well with this

(4) Declutter:

• continue to work on the house a bit at a time.
• read my Organizing from the Inside Out book, and do the exercises

(5) Write:

• Write 5/7, at least
• Treat it like a job
• Work on organizing my Plotting notes, to create a system I can follow each time I start a new story idea.
• Have a plot outline for “Alex” story by the month’s end

I’ve been thinking a lot about my goals and so forth. As I said in an earlier post, I’m beginning to agree with snowleopard that 10 goals is too many. I want to trim it down, and concentrate on four.

I’ve also been thinking about a question from the Jinny Ditzler book that really struck me. If I could make one change to my life that would bring about the most dramatic improvement, what would it be? I’ve used that question as my measuring stick, when considering which goals to adopt as my priorities.

What is the biggest problem area in my life right now? I’d have to say, stress. Ever since my Dad got sick and passed away, the stress in my life has been like a runaway train, and I don’t see an end to it any time soon. It is affecting me physically, emotionally, psychologically… it’s affecting my interactions with others; it’s affecting my ability to tackle my goals.

My number one fantasy these days is that I move to New Zealand and leave no forwarding address. (Well, and maybe I take DH and the kids with me.) I move away from all responsibilities and problems, and escape to a peaceful, kiwi-intensive existence. Ahhh – that’s the ticket.

Okay, that’s not going to happen. But I can look at my sources of stress, and decide which ones I can do something about. I can also try to find better, healthier ways of coping with the stresses I can’t remove from my life.

So here are my February focus points:

(1) Health This will encompass eating properly, getting the right amount of sleep, ensuring I have necessary appts with doctor, dentist, etc. and don’t put them off because I’m ‘too busy’.

(2) Physical Activity Okay, this could be an extension of physical health, but I’m keeping it as a separate goal. I want to be active to promote physical health and strength, and also as a strategy for more effectively releasing stress (instead of eating a tub of ice cream or sleeping all afternoon, get out and whack a tennis ball until I feel better).

(3) Stress management Aside from eating well and exercising, what else can I do to reduce/manage stress? This can include, making sure I have time out with friends, meditating or doing yoga in the evening, getting a massage, writing in my journal about things that are bothering me, etc.

(4) Decluttering and organizing The chaotic state of our house is an ongoing source of stress that I can do something about. Creating an organized and attractive home environment will definitely lead to my increased psychological and emotional well-being, when my home is a place of refuge, not a disaster to endure!

So I’m going to reorganize to make these the goals I concentrate on for February, and possibly the rest of the year. I’ll let my other goals become “would be nice if I get to them” goals, but I won’t sweat about them.

(1) Health:
I’m thinking that my many aches, pains, fatigues, headaches, susceptibility to viruses, etc. is a result of being under huge stress this last year, and letting myself get emotionally and physically run down. I’m 41, but some days I feel like I’m about 80.

I want to prioritize this goal, and really make it about managing my stress in a healthy way, healthy eating and exercise, and so on. I can’t keep mistreating my body, then wondering why I feel like cr@p.

(2) Get Active:
Continue tennis with DH. Lessons on Mon night, and tennis lunch on Wed; maybe one other time a week?

Doing the weight training program for 5 more Mondays. Would like to do weights at least one other day during the week, maybe two.

Rowing machine: it’s sitting there every day. Try to get on and row at least every other day.

(3) Learn:
Going to continue to concentrate on piano. If I manage to get in algebra, that’s a bonus.

(4) Be Beautiful!
Look into laser hair removal.

(5) Write:
Continue with morning pages.

(6) Volunteer:
Work on science fair certificate design; hot lunch program (delegate, don’t do); lunch supervision continues; follow up with pancake tues and cake raffle.

(7) Nurture family members, etc.
update Mom’s and H’s online banking stuff, and file papers; deposit cheque in Mom’s account; print off Feb chore schedule for kids.

(8) Create
Get out spools wall-hanging and finish it up

(9) Organize, discard, decorate, etc.
Pick spot-of-the-week for clean/decluttering; look at paint choices and beadboard choices in Home Depot, and take some measurements in laundry room. Put Discardia in car, and drop off to Goodwill.

(10) Husband
Continue to work on telling him what I feel and what I need. Two date nights in February. Try to schedule at least one lunch a week where we play tennis, and one lunch a week where we meet at home for some hot and sweaty sex in the middle of the day.