stop procrastinating

i’ve been putting off marking this goal as done
but it is done
because its somewhat of an oxymoron

like i wrote earlier,
everything you do is done at the expense of something else.
no matter what you do, you’re putting off something else to get what you’re doing done now.

you never stop procrastinating,

means, you never stop putting things off to do later

it is more important to know how to schedule your stuff.

because everything that IS DONE has been done AT THE EXPENSE of something else.

If I was going to do homework, but decided that looking at porn is more important, I am merely getting psyched up to do homework.

or instead of fixing the cabinets in the bedroom I rearranged the computers in the living room so that the noisy Linux machine is locked up and away while still accessible over the LAN.

I am procrastinating with full force today! Feeling just a little bit overwhelmed. Nothing I need to do is difficult. It just takes a bit of focus to make a decision on how to proceed. The focus on making a decision is unavailable, for some reason. It feels good to be on the verge of accomplishment, and imagine what it would be like to do it all and, how it would feel when it is all done, and yet…. it is not enough. NOT ENOUGH. IT IS NEVER ENOUGH to balance on the verge of doing and not doing…. no such ZEN!

i ended the night wasting time on the internet and started this morning in the same manner. Feeling kind of empty and useless, I cleaned up the cat litter and put away the dishes before leaving the house for the day, hoping my girlfriend won’t take an issue with it.

I procrastinated eating lunch today, and only got to it by late afternoon. I am procrastinating learning how the Veritas filesystem suite works so I can finally finish that Damn Disaster Recovery (DR) server.

this morning i procrastinated on cleaning the cat litter and emptying the dishwasher. i found it more worthwhile to fuck around online for some reason, even though it gave me no satisfaction or a sense of accomplishment.