Enjoy every moment with my husband

Since my hip began bothering me a few months ago, I have been distracted by pain. It seems I do not do well with chronic pain. I know ,who does? Right? Well, apparently, I haven’t been listening, paying attention very well or getting much done at work. It’s really taken its toll. In addition, the pain had led to loss of sleep. And I’m someone who enjoys and functions best on 8 solid hours of sleep. So the three hours a night I’ve been getting the past three weeks have not done me good either.

My hubby has been a gem. He has not outwardly shown his frustration around anyone. I can only tell his frustration because I know him so well.

Unfortunately, this does not fall under “enjoy every moment.” But he has certainly made the whole thing more bearable. I can’t wait til I’m better and can treat him as well as he diserves.

Today, hubby and I biked to a nice new Mexican restaurant for brunch. It was yummy and filling. We took the short way home, took a nap, then went out later to finish the route.

It was not as fun a ride as I had hoped, but good enough. Trying to spend time before I head to Seattle for the week for work.

of bike riding with hubby, emotionally, it is a nice high. Yes, I struggle up the hills. My quads cramp and I get out of breath. Then I whine a little. But the rest of the time, we talk while we ride. And I really enjoy that time with him.

Last night we were treated to free last minute tickets to Capital Rep to see Doubt a Parable.

So I called hubby and asked him if he was up for it. He rushed into town and we got there just in time. It was a little harried getting there, but once we did, we had a great time.

I love that sort of thing.

When I am on a bike ride with hubby it is uninterrupted time without TV, computer or something. It’s really nice if I didn’t sweat so much or gasp for air. I’m not in terrible shape, we just live in a very hilly area.

But we do get a chance to talk, even between my gasps. That is my new motivation to ride :)

So I had been thinking about how I get bored with the relationship once in a while. Not in a bad way like wanting to cheat or anything. He’s still my BFF. Just same old same old. Money is tight so we don’t go out all that much. In fact, we almost never go out just the two of us. We save that for friends or family. So it’s just not fun making dinner and sitting in front of the TV every night.

So on my last work trip, I had an idea that I suggested.

I asked him to plan just one evening a month where HE cooks dinner for me. Just once. It doesn’t matter if it’s mac and cheese, or cereal. Just something. And we’ll sit at the dining room table together with no distractions.

And at least once a month I will make a really nice dinner for him. And we’ll sit at the table with no distractions.

Well, he didn’t like the idea. And although e agreed to it, he was pretty fussy about it. I don’t think I’m asking a lot. He just hates to cook and feels insecure about it. So it’s not great for him to think about. But I’m thinking if he succeeds a few times with cooking, it might actually improve his self esteem.

But it’s going to be hard to get to that point. He just needs some basic recipes that are easy to follow and don’t take a lot of prep or attention.

I hope it works out. And I hope he doesn’t resent me for the request.

I was traveling on Thursday and Friday. I came back very late Friday night after a delayed flight. I was totally exhausted.

When I woke up Saturday I was cranky and really tired. I had pinched a nerve in my shoulder carrying my bag and I could barely move my head. Everything hubby said just pissed me off. I tried to keep my mouth shut, but it just made him afraid to talk with me.

I went back to sleep for two hours. When I woke up, I had to snap out of it. I took a shower and talked myself out of it.

He went from simply not bearable to fun to be around.

It is amazing how your own mood and circumstance can ruin your ability to enjoy life, and the wonderful company of your partner. I’m glad I’m back to normal.

It is hard to enjoy bike riding around my house. All the damn hills. It is no relaxing exercise. I dread it a little every time.

But hubby is so good. Even though he is in primo shape, he cheers me on and sticks to my pace. And I love that. And even though I’m sweating and in a little pain, he stands by me.

When the ride is over, I feel great. And I’m always thankful he talked me into it. It’s good quality time we spend without the computer or TV. Even if it is in between my panting, we talk.

So I can honestly say that in a strange, twisted way, I enjoy those moments with my husband, even though I am usually in some sort of pain :)

I think he’s getting depressed and I’m not sure what to do. HE freaks out over the small stuff and is completely inconsolable. He’s just not fun to be around. I know folks are going to tell me to get help for him, send him to the doctor. But the last time he went into a bad depression, he refused help and refused drugs. After a year and a job relocation, I threatened to leave him and he snapped out of it (or at least faked it) until he was actually out of it.

We’ve been awesome ever since. What is this, his 7 year itch? Seems like a cycle. The first time was 6 years into our relationship. Now it’s 7 years later. I’ve read about herbs and other foods that might help with depression. omega fatty acids, flax, fish oils. I’m going to be using a lot of these in cooking and keep him away from alcohol. Also trying to get him to exercise. Endorphines and all. Anyone have other non-medical suggestions?

This morning, hubby and I went for a quick ski jaunt. Got to the mountain at 9:30 am. Done at 1. It was so much fun. It was snowing and I went on 2 trails I had never been on before. One, called “turnpike”, was narrow and had these curving lips on them that was almost like parts of a terrain park. I screamed with delight all the way down the trail. What a blast!

Came home, had lunch. Sex. Okay, very good sex. Exhausted. Nap. Dinner. And we just went to see Juno. Great movie. I laughed, I cried, it became a part of me.

Then, hubby made me laugh so hard I had tears streaming down my cheeks. We went back to the car after the movie and the windshield was visited by Jack Frost. Hubby went to scrape the window and the scraper made this god awful screech. It’s so harf to describe, but the comedic timing and situation made me laugh nonstop. I nearly had an asthma attack.

Now, sitting on the couch, relaxing. What an incredible day. I have nejoyed every moment with him today.