control my anger

It was never about conrolling, it was about releasing. I have released a lot of my anger and now I have a better ability to deal with annoyance and frustration without reacting emotionally.

I’ve found that I am able to control the anger with my kids now, I just breathe, get down to their level and speak. Not so easy with the big kid, but I am learning to communicate how I am feeling rather than yelling with him too. I was getting angry because I was letting the feelings build up to the pressure cooker stage instead of expressing myself to begin with.

I still feel like the hulk – that I turn into this big green monster when I get angry and the things I say – it’s like I loose my brain – like the Bruce Banner when he becomes the hulk.

I really mut find a way of dealing with this. It all starts with a reaction generally unwarranted.

It’s amazing when I worked through the issue rather than wasting the energy on getting angry I not only felt better, but I had the energy for other things.
That logic stuff works a treat. I felt myself getting annoyed and so I stopped and looked at why it was annoying me and vented that annoyance laughed and moved on.
If I can keep this up until the end of the month then I’m ready to say that I have control

I’m beginning to uncover the underlying reasons for some of my anger – and realising that they are stupid!!!
I have via some of my other things come to realise that I expect too much – I expect perfection in everything and because things don’t meet those expectations I get angry!!

If I were more tolerant things wouldnt annoy me so much and then I wouldn’t get angry as much

Wow – it is hard to stop yourself from being angry by using logic. It works – I think – like this morning – I curbed my anger by not allowing myself to ramble off on the emotional tangents, throwing accusations. Instead I simply stated that the person’s behaviour was frustrating me – didnt’ do it all that well because he doesn’t know what is bothering me still and that was because I stopped myself from saying anything because I could hear the anger in my words as I formulated them in my head.
Now to write him an email and explain myself without the emotion.

• Today’s approach to stopping myself from getting angry

Remind myself that getting angry is not going to fix anything, that it won’t make me feel any better, infact it could make me feel worse. Use cold hard logic, remind myself that the world is “not out to get me,” I’m just just experiencing some of the rough spots of daily life. Logic defeats anger, because anger, even when it’s justified, can quickly become irrational.

I think that I need to uncover the reason why I get angry before I can do anything much about it. Still working on the best approach – so this week I’m going to write down what I got angry about and try to disect why it made me angry – how I reacted. If that doesn’t work then I think I’ll try some regression to uncover the incident that I haven’t dealt with.