enjoy living

I finished two scrapbooks and will probably start another. Maybe by the time I am old I will have a bookshelve of scrapbooked memories to look at, and to show to the young people around me lol

because they’re good and one every now and then isn’t going to do that much damage, right?

The one beatles song i love is the song “in my life” I love it! There are so many people i am missing right now. some of them i will see agian, some i will not.

in the past month i have been warned against hanging out with all three of the guys that wanted to hang out with me. Apparently they are known for getting girls drunk and taking advantage, which makes perfect sense, because they all want to go drinking, and have all texted me at great length with too much excitment about hanging out. For their information, I am no looser drunk then i am sober. So Ha!

anyway, i need to be more picky with whom i may hang out with. at least i have current freinds who look after me!!!

I am too tense. and i get nervous over sillly things. but i don’t know how to relax.

so part of enjoying life is something i have never and sometimes think i will never experience….being in love. I have never let myself fall in love in a romantic aspect though i do get very attached very quickly to the people in my life. I have an obvious fear and insecurity. sometimes i envy the relationships i see, but most the time i tell myself i’m glad i don’t have to deal with all the extra baggage. I also make a habit of the high school crush syndrome but it’s always on someone i can’t have, which i sincerely think i’m doing to myself subconciusly.

lately people at work are pushing on me that i need to put myself out there and meet someone special. part of me thinks they’re right. the other part of me just wants to be left alone.

I am thankful for the caring and closeness of my family
my small crazy little dog that i love so much
a flexible job where i work with people i’ve come to love
a place to feel safe
my roomie who is tolerable of craziness
the friends I’ve had, will have, and do have
the ability to always get by on bills and other important things
random opportunities for more fun

list isn’t mine!!

1. Be optimistic!
2. Follow your gut
3. Make enough money to fill you basic needs
4. push beyond your comfort zone
5. keep close with friends and family
6. find happiness in the job you have now
7. smile
8. forgive
9. make friends that share you interest

It says that your job doesn’t have as much to do with your happiness and ability to enjoy life as much as your outlook and relationships with people. I didn’t know that. I’ve always applied to my thoughts that if I’m going to be satisfied and happy with myself and my life I’ll need a job that makes me feel important.

Take advantage of more oppurtunities!

I’ve turned down a trip to SC with some friends. I can afford it. But at the same time, the idea of this trip doesn’t excite me much. These two friends are closer to one another than I am to either of them. And they’re more at ease in social groups. Maybe i just feel too much like a third wheel. Besides, they’ll be a lot of getting drunk, which doesn’t interest me at all.

However, I still wish I’d be more open to accepting more invitations.

I’m sure this will be an more enjoyable less boring life if I spent some of it not just drifting from work, to my parents house, and back to the apartment, but going out.

I was able to find a friends house in jeff on my own without help for his most recent party! And tomorrow I am going to a cupcake tasting. The 19th I’m supposed to go to a get together in louisville, where I mostly avoid the driving. But I should start concuring fears, and what better way to start then by getting out and having fun in locations I fear driving though!!