find love

can’t find love in my own motherr… so how the fuck am i supposed to find it in others?

well i’ve had these two main crushes.
but it’s not working out!
the harder i look for love and the closer i get… it just doesn’t turn out the way that i want it to be.
i either have to change myself for someone to love me

seems like i’m just the ugliest most undesirable person at the moment and it’s killing me.
should i really try to find love when it puts me through this much pain?

ah ef it…
this is freakin impossible.
and hurrts way too much.

arrrgh!
i’ve liked this guy for two yearrs and he just recently started talking to me and we’ve been meeting up the city and that shiznit… i keep hoping that maybe he likes me in that way! but no… i think i’m more of a friend to him that can supply him with girls (my friends) it hurts so much…

i want him to like me.. but do i really have to change myself?
maybe he just… doesn’t want me.
feels like crap this love business but i won’t give up hope.

i think it’s just gotten to the point that i want love so badly, and i’m looking in all the wrong places.

i’m pining it too much, that it could be right in front of me but i don’t even know it.
it’s just, all the people i love around me are my support system but i haven’t found that one person who i support… gah finding love is impossible.