play basketball again

i realized that i was able to do it already. this past few weeks, i was able to play basketball twice maybe.i still feel conscious about myself though that’s why it’s not that worth it. but my goal is to be better at it and to win over boys. haha! that’s girl power. i want to prove that girls are not inferior to boys and as a girl, i can play even better than them. then, i want to teach. maybe kids because kids are so nice to teach or play with. only if i could just win over my issue, i think, my life can turn better even for a little bit.

i always try to please others both unconsciously and consciously. and even though i excel in a particular activity – sports, music, i still feel empty. the cheers and compliments i received before were not enough – not enough to complete me. now, i’m back to playing the sports that i love and know and i dont care what others will say. i don’t even want to hear from stereotypes (that basketball is only for guys and you’ll end up being a guy if you play it) anymore. I WANT to impove and be really good in playing basketball. I WANT to BE HAPPY. and this time, i’ll do it for myself.