not be jealous

I was never a jealous person until I met my current boyfriend. My past serious relationships were easy smeezy, they pretty much gave me anything I wanted on a platter (not money or anything like that, but they offered up their emotions on a platter) and my current boyfriend makes me work really hard to get into his heart. He has issues with his mother that is deeply rooted and he has a hard time fully opening up to women. I’m his first serious relationship and he’s 32….that should have told me something. He has been single the majority of his adult life, and along the way has made alot of friends that are women, and they come in and out of his life from time to time. I do love him more than anyone or anything, and maybe that is why I am jealous when he interacts with other women: I’m afraid of losing him and this intense love I have for him. I don’t freak out on him anymore lately, I’ve learned to reign in the “crazy” as I call it, but I still get a tingling in my stomach, and I feel my face get red, and I start to verbally question him, which I know he hates. I’ve done it all, thrown drinks in his face, broken plates, cussed him out in public, and of course looked in his phone. 90% of the time he doesn’t deserve this, he’s a wonderful man that has always been faithful and trustworthy, he’s just flirty, it’s his nature, but I’m just not used to this behavior from a boyfriend. Ugh, I just wish I could be the “cool” girlfriend that has no issues whatsoever with him flirting with other women, but I don’t know how to be…