I haven’t seen him in three years (until a few weeks ago). I still believe that I was utterly and completely in love with him, but now I also think that he may have been using me. An awful thing to do, when your thousands of miles away in Afghanistan for 3/4 of the relationship. He had someone to send him letters and someone to come home to on his leave. And when he didn’t need me anymore, he cut me out of his life. It hurt me so much and I’m still not over him.
Seeing him opened up all of those wounds, and made it hard again. I don’t think I’ll see him again, but I’m glad I did this time. If nothing else, it let me know that seeing him WON’T help.