I want to fall so deeply in love that neither of us could ever fall out of it.

We broke up.We had a huge fight and we broke up. I still can’t believe it. We had booked our holidays. I had to cancel them yesterday.

I have waited for so long for someone who I found worthwhile. It’s a long distance relationship and to tell the truth I am having big problems to deal with it. I simply don’t know how to handle with this kind of relationship.I am afraid and I don’t trust. I full of negative emotions such as jealousy, fear, mistrust even hate. I don’t want to be a paranoid woman but I assume what I feel and unfortunately I’m feeling this.

I am falling in love. Slowly and frighteningly. I don’t fall in love easily. I am always analysing and questioning. I’m afraid to trust and to be hurt, but who isn’t? So I just want to enjoy this feeling without so many analysis, examinations or associations with the past.

procuro – Mário Cesariny

Em todas as ruas te encontro
em todas as ruas te perco
conheço tão bem o teu corpo
sonhei tanto a tua figura
que é de olhos fechados que eu ando
a limitar a tua altura
e bebo a água e sorvo o ar
que te atravessou a cintura
tanto tão perto tão real
que o meu corpo se transfigura
e toca o seu próprio elemento
num corpo que já não é seu
num rio que desapareceu
onde um braço teu me procura

Em todas as ruas te encontro
em todas as ruas te perco