I have been with the love of my life for about 8 yrs. he is a really good guy but I had to break up with him yet again because he is not Jewish and I am. For some reason this time it hurts much more than any other time we have separated. I was fine the first couple of days and then I realized that I have no friends. No real career to speak of so I have nothing to really look forward to. The friends I do have are all codependent on me and right now I need someone else to lean on.
I keep imagining him with someone else. I know he is not the type to jump into bed with the next pair of legs, but I know it will happen. I broke up with him to give him his freedom. There is a big gap in my life and its weird I feel empty inside, and I have no real appetite. What if I will never find anyone who will love me the way he loves me?
Last night after work I sat in the park and cried for a good hour before I went home. I called him pretending that it was an accident. All he said was ok I’ll talk to you later. I sit at work all day begging that the next call is him,
I have no idea how to live my life without him. He is the only man I have ever been with and now I have to live without him. Sometimes I feel that I may never find someone and that I will be the old lady who cries all the time.
