Confidence — 1 year ago
I have a perfect friend. I’m not kidding, she’s perfect at everything. She’s smart, nice, pretty, captain of her volleyball team, a student council member, a community service leader, you name it. Oh and she can get any guy she wants. Even guys she doesn’t want. What is it that makes them obsessed with her? Since she was 13 she’s hasn’t gone 3 weeks without a boyfriend. It’s wierd. Because I talk to guys and I’m on a varsity sport and I do community service and none of this seems to matter. And I continue to compare myself to her.
I lack self-confidence. Honestly, I want to be myself and be proud and happy all the time. But I do something remotely dumb or silly and embarassing and I’m thinking, “what must these people be thinking about me?” I’m thinking that every person who just watched me do that silly thing is going to walk away and talk behind my back about what a freak I am. And I should know beter. I want to be confident. I want to wear a purple monkey suit in public and think, “Wow, I’m really cool. And I’m happy being me.”
We’ll see. Most of the time it just seems like a crazy dream.
