stop procrastinating

Reading the entries of those people who actually finished this goal, it seems that they all just needed make up their minds to do it and did it. So, simple as that right.

So, while also limiting myself to the most important things, today I want to:
1) Work
- Summarize the workshop outcomes 13.00
- Write the justification
- Prepare the contract

2) Home
- Do the laundry
- Iron
- Install the wireless

3) Me
- Keep track of how I spend my time
- Use WW
- Drink 2 litres of water 12.00

Going with the Zenhabits today, I will define my three most important tasks of the day, plus a reminder of my long term goals.

plus
1) Do it now
2) Get moving

and the rest just has to come along.

I don’t know what is wrong with me. I wake up in the morning and know exactly what I want and have to do today. I feel motivated, not necessarily excited, but I know that the things need to be done. Then I arrive at the office, slump into my chair and feel totally drained, bored, basically ready to go home again. I don’t know why. It’s not that I don’t like going to the office, it’s not that I don’t like to work. It might that the things I have to do, don’t get me excited, but I don’t know what kind of things would or how to integrate those into my worklife. This is frustrating.

... at the ultimate task for a procrastinator. I have an assignment I don’t know anything about. So I have to do research on several topics, plus learn how to do use the software. It feels once again overwhelming and I already feel how I get pulled into doing something else just to escape this. Of course, I can’t because this is my job, but it has gotten clearer to me that a lot of procrastination is based on fear.

Another bad week and this is starting to worry me again. Since I am still basically between jobs I am missing structure and I hardly get anything done. It’s so sad because I would have the time to do lot’s and lot’s of things. I hate myself for being unable to move and do things that urgently need to be done. So not good…

If decided to take Kasha’s working binge as a great example and to get productive. Lot’s of things I can do today, even though I still have stomach cramps from that “great falafel place” we went to on Sunday.
I will
- go to the drug store
- return the first load of recycling stuff
- pick up the books for my sister
- talk to the insurance guys
- finalise the registration and payment
- finish the letter to my landlord
- book my train ticket and find out where I need to go tomorrow
- throw out all the garbage
- pack my stuff

and do some socialising. :-)

I handed in my visa application and all the stuff needed in time, but it turns out, this was not enough. So now I am stuck here without a place to live. I could have handed it in earlier, but I thought “in time” was enough. Well, apparently only if no one else messes up. I did procrastinate on it and this is the price to pay. I am so mad at myself.

Procrasting on the things I don’t like doing or I actively just dont’t want to do is one thing. It’s clearly bad enough, but I think I could live with it. What really bothers me though is me procrastinating on life… on the things I want to do, on the things I need to do to have the life I want, on the things I want to be recognised with. I started thinking on this earlier and once again realised, that I am not sure what exactly it is that I want to do, what kind of life I want to live, how I want to be seen. Maybe the key to procrastination is finding how you want to be….

..have not been good. I am trying to prepare my move to SA and it is this overwhelming task that scares me and comes along with a whole set of anxieties about my life and the choices that I made. At the same time, I have preparation courses all day long that fill the time, but I still don’t get anything done. I sit there all day and listen to someone talk. At the end, I am tired and not motivated at all to start doing things I hate, like calling insurance companies, arranging flights and selling my furniture. At least I made a pretty complete to-do-list today, which covers several pages in my notebook, but gives me a sense of direction.

Quite a good day today. Fueled by the anger with myself and my procrastination, that is keeping me from living life the way I want and from being person I want to be, I managed to get quite a few things done today. I can’t really enjoy the satisfaction though, because that anger is still so strong. Still, it feels good that I have done some things, even those that I didn’t feel like doing, even those I thought of like “it’s to late now, I’ll do them tomorrow”. I did spend some time socializing as well which I need, couldn’t help feeling bad about it anyway. If I can keep this level up, it would be great. I just have to find a different fuel instead of this anger…