stop being afraid of getting hurt and just jump in (sometimes)

I must say I have been doing this in many little ways lately. And you know it is quite nice. It’s a free feeling to just let go and leap sometimes. You can make stronger memories that way!

Well i got an email from him about an hour ago. First time i have heard from him in 2 weeks. He has a show tomorrow that i would be able to go to. Said that he left his phone at a show in another state and that it still has not arrived. Which i believe becuase he has been know to leave everything at shows (besides his precious bass) before. So in return does not have me number because its only on his phone. ask me to send it again if i wanted to talk.said he had been thinking about my life and his life and is not sure how we are going to make this work. I see that as a blow off. because i think that you can make anything work if you want to, some of them you just have to try a lot harder at. Also, said he understands if i dont want to come to his show and see him. is that a nice way of saying please dont come to my show. he so made me believe that he was different. So now what to do? Move on? Go to the show? Email him back? Give him my number again? I have this feeling things with him really would have been different. I have never been know to chase guys before. So why him? Any advice?????

I have proof again that I just need to quit jumping. I have much reason to stay afraid of getting hurt. Because I jumped and now I am crying about it! I know it’s as much about the journey as it is the destination. But the thing that scares me is I am afraid that there is no real destination for me. That what scares me the most right now.

to think I will always get hurt. Because I usually do. And I don’t think this time will be any different.

Well I jumped in the other night! I had a great time just letting go and having a blast. But I am not sure if I regret it yet or not. We will se how tonight goes. I do not want to regret the other night and I do not want to end up getting hurt by things. Maybe, hopefully this will be the one thing that always works out for me. It would be nice.