stop procrastinating

this is becoming an issue.

as we speak I’m indulging in this weakness…

it’s honestly an addiction…

I ended up getting a 90 on the paper! It was SUCH a relief. But since then, I’ve learned that procrastinating doesn’t get you anywhere but stressed out. Next semester I am going to make a conscious effort to do things AHEAD OF TIME and not the night before. Just because I was given grace this time doesn’t mean that I shouldn’t continue working on this goal.

I had a 8-10 page paper that was asssigned for weeks and me, being my time wasting, procrastinating self, decided to wait until the night before to start the paper. Convinced that I could and almost prepared to pull an all-nighter, because I have completed these assignments the night before in the past, I set out to do it. I had HOURS. I found that I cracked, abnormally (normally I write best under pressure) under pressure and couldn’t conceptualize my thesis in order to develop it. Also, I am an overachiever, so consequently I couldn’t choose an easy thesis that could easily be tackled or anything, but had to make it as profound as I could. BAD IDEA. I ended up thinking that in order to clear my mind I needed to go to sleep for a while, and the paper was due this morning at 9:30. This was at around 4:30 last night. I ended up waking up at 8:30 with a minimum of 4 more pages ahead of me. Needless to say, I didn’t finish. I went to my professor and had to explain to her that I wasn’t finished. :( So shameful. She gave me an extention until Tuesday with a grade deduction. Now I’m afraid to even write the thing because she is going to be extra critical with it since it’s late. I’ve gotten A’s on all my other papers in her course, but they weren’t as extensive as this one. Sigh.
I hate that I procrastinated. I even prayed and prayed and prayed and knew consciously that I had screwed up by waiting until the last minute, but I guess God was gracious in a different way than I expected; he allowed for my professor to at least accept it at a later date.

I find that I frequently need to remind myself that…
all the work is in taking the first step. The first step is the hardest; whether it be the first step out of bed in the morning, or the first step on a run you’re about to take. The first step will get you one step closer to where you want to go, faster than you were going one step before.

My reason for rhapsody?
I was behind on Tristram Shandy. I’ve started catching up. I took the first step.