I am having a really hard time letting go. Letting my anger go. Letting my disappointments go. Letting people go. And letting my heart have an opportunity to heal itself. I’m having a hard time forgiving people. I’m having a hard time not taking action- when I know- I KNOW- it just needs to be let go. I’m having a hard time trusting (which is my biggest problem) that God will take care of this in his time. I don’t need to do anything. I don’t need to expect anything. I don’t need to fix this- and yet I want to. I want God to fix it now- because I’m afraid, in my impatience, I’ll do something impulsive- and stupid- and screw things up more than I already have.
How do I let go? How do I let go of them? How do I let go? I’m so surprised how mad I am. How hurt I am. How much I want to run away. How much I want to cry. And why I can’t? And I don’t know when God is going to finally step in. I’m waiting. I’m not doing anything- it’s God’s turn. And I’m tired.