be more attractive

I need to replace my sugary drinks with grapefruit juice.

List of foods and meals I need to eat alot more of:

Fruit salad
Mozzarella and sundried/cherry tomatoes (lunch)
Chicken Breast with two veg
king prawn vegetable stir fry
Lamb chops with two veg
Chicken Tortillas

I gave myself a pedicure and plucked my eyebrows last night. It’s a shame I won’t be wearing open-toe stilletoes anytime soon as my toes look so pretty. My eyebrows look fresh too.

I need to start exfoliating my face now, dad just bought me some new exfoliator which is on special offer at the supermarket so there’s no excuse. Plus I’m gonna utilize the offer and buy myself some more.

working on myself physically really helps in so many ways:

1) When I’m lonely it distracts me and gives me something to do
2) When I’m feeling depressed it acts as a positive constructive activity which deflects those negative inner feelings.

3) With each beauty treatment I give myself I am telling myself that I have respect for myself and I deserve to be treated and pampered.
4) With each beauty treatment I am giving myself, I am a step closer to being that beautiful young woman I was in 2004. Yay I live for her!

I need to keep this up, it’ll do me the world of good.

A newly acquired friend saw a picture of me from summer 07 that I have on my screen saver on my mobile and said ‘that girl on your phone is so pretty who is it?’

It was me!

I must really look different. Poignantly less attractive. Defensively I said to another new friend walking with us ‘remember I showed you this picture when you came to my house?’ and she replied ‘yeah, it was taken when you were like 16 or something wasn’t it?’ That comment really deflated me. The picture was only taken under two years ago when I was 22- I am now 23! (24 next month)

That has really made me feel down, because the comments from the girls were inoccent enough but go to show how far I have slipped from the ages 0f 22 to 23. Even at 22 I wasn’t were I wanted to be looks wise and have slipped way further down since then.

I really need to get back to my former highly attractive self because this isn’t even slightly amusing. It all comes down to my weight really. If I were to drop a stone ad a half right now, I could walk down the street and turn heads like I used to. I just need the motivation.

I think that I need to have more personal integrity when dealing with this goal. Perhaps I should think about how it feels every time I bump into somebody from my past looking like crap.

Making tiny changes is really beginning to make a difference. I’ve not weighed myself but Im sure I’ve lost a couple of pounds as my jeans feel looser. Im scared to weigh myself though cause I dont want to get caught in a spiral obsessing over my weight. Im making an effort to shave although its winter and nobody sees my body but me. I feel the difference and Im realising that looking after myself makes ME feel better.

tHIS CHRISTMAS I’m going to try to get back to the old me: new clothes, jewellery and hair done.

in the past two years I have clearly let myself go. Probably out of laziness and the comfort of being in a long term relationship which is now over. When I first got with my ex, the ball was in my court when it came to the opposite sex. I was considered pretty even beautiful by many. I was a curvy size UK 12 (US 8) with shoulder length hair. I am stating this because now I am a size 16 (US 12) now and have since cut off all my hair cause it was so badly damaged from neglect.

I dont feel sexy or that pretty anymore within myself and although I do not validate myself through the attention of men, now that I am no longer in a relationship it would be nice to feel attractive and maybe get some attention from the right people of course.

I am far from a shallow person, but even I know that I have dreadfully let myself go- others around me have not so kindly pointed it out to and my confidence is up in the air right now. I ised to be considered a hot chick and now men dont even look at me. I wouldnt care if I felt good about myself but I dont and know that I shouldnt look the way I do right now. I would eventually like to meet someone new again once I’ve healed and am ready to do so, however at the moment guys who I used to reject wouldnt even ask me out now.

I have been exercising on average twice a week, but I just dont seem to have the energy because of my new job. My weight and looks are beginning to be a source of anxiety, and I just want my long hair back!