keep getting back on the tightrope

I suppose in the end it’s all for the good, since it has made me acknowledge the seriousness of the problem and take action. I’d been teetering on the tightrope badly for a while, and then this past week fell off completely. Professional tightrope adjusters and acrobatic analysts have been called in to help me deal with the problem. Hopefully I will be back up there soon; the circus tent floor is quite filthy and dismal, and the trained bears are giving me a hard time.

Apparently, after this last fall, I am going to spend some time at Remedial Acrobatics Camp. There I will not only work on my flexibility, balance, and backflips, but also learn to build a nice wide bridge with handrails in midair. That’s the hope, anyway.

_{well, I suppose I have some ideas} but when I’m at my parents’ house I am far more susceptible to episodes of depression – serious big-time mood swings, utter fatigue, bouts of frightening hopelessness and a complete loss of momentum. I’ve been kind of worried about myself lately, when I’ve had the mental presence to be worried rather than just completely sunk. It hasn’t been constant, this horrible feeling, but it’s been pretty frequent, and the in-between is just a kind of dull okay.

It’s been a rocky summer so far. Hope it gets better.

I suddenly find I can’t even see it.

Crap.

(must monitor my bedtime reading more closely: environmental reportage does not make for happy bedtimes in the best of circumstances). Think I’m back up there now. I need stickier shoes.

I need a ladder!

ok, again.