get straight A's for one semester

I seem to have improved slightly, in the motivation department, but I still don’t think that straight A’s are a possibility. I’ll be satisfied with B’s for this semester, but I’ll be trying towards A’s again come fall. Oh well. So long as I’m improving.

I was doing so well with my ambition for this goal for about two weeks, but all of the sudden, it’s like I can’t make myself care, just like last semester. This can’t happen. Last semester, I believe my problem was that I was off my depression medication, so I just slept all the time and felt shitty. But I’m back on it. So I have no excuse.

Already, I have a short story that was due last week that I haven’t written. This stems, in part, from my fear of writing fiction and having a group of people read and criticize it. But I’ll need to get over this. I need to do well in school. Now.

I’m going to shoot for A’s, but if I don’t quite make it, I’ll be okay knowing that I honestly tried. Last semester I failed two classes and got mediocre grades in the others. If I continue to do poorly, I’ll never get into the Peace Corps, and that’s my only real plan for once I get my bachelor’s degree… so I’d rather not totally screw up my future, thanks. I just need to find motivation within myself… that’s the hard part.

I’m thinking it’s already too late for this goal to happen this semester, but in spring I will try my absolute hardest.