- I’m hoping to maybe ask for more responsibilities as there is someone leaving at the end of the month, and I’m trying to make the case that I could probably do most of her work and mine, and if I was able to save the company a lot of money by taking over a full extra position, I think that would probably be worth me making a case for a pretty decent raise.
- I’ve lost 4 pounds. I don’t have a scale, so it’s possible since I last went to the dr. I could have lost more, but I don’t know for sure. I’m working on the losing weight for real right now, we’ll see.
- I’m a lot better about being better on myself. Especially after my diagnosis. It was a relief, to say, “This is just how I am, and I’m not being weak or a baby. I’m just in more pain than normal people.” The ability to have something to point to, to explain how I am… it allowed me to be better to myself. It explains why sometimes I need more sleep, or sometimes, I really just have trouble walking.
- We need to make sure it’s not the more serious version of what I have before we start looking at houses right now. Because, that would change where I want to live. I wouldn’t need to live in a certain area, because I would not be having kids. If I’m not having kids, I can live a lot more places. I would even move west or to Florida. If I don’t have to worry about whether or not the school is good.
- The same goes for having kids. Obviously, the prgnancy goal is on hold until the diagnosis is for sure one type or the other. I am not bringing a child into the world if I know my life expectancy is under 50 years old and I have a 50% chance of passing that on to my children and a 12% chance of dying during childbirth.
*The language goal has been no progress. BUT I did fianlly invest in a pair of earbuds so, I could feasably do this while in the many waiting rooms I’ll be in in my future.
Beth has written 17 entries about this goal
•I got a small raise in Jan. So, I guess this part of my goals are completed, but I’m going to keep wroking hard so I can get more money sooner rather than later.
•Slowly working on getting better clothes.
•Haven’t really lost weight, with the pain it’s been just too hard to try to keep up with right now. I’m trying to fix one thing at a time… and it’s all I can do right now.
• I’m still kinda hard on myself, but I think I’ve been a little better. When I’m exhausted, I take a nap. I know that’s a stupid pro for this, but I wasn’t taking naps, trying to get everything done… and it was affecting me. So, if I’m too tired, I just sleep. It’s not a big step, but it’s one in the rigth direction.
• My husband is talking to the loan officer now to obtain a loan as quickly and easily as possible once we get the money, THEN in June (or around then) we will start looking for houses!!! We have somewhat agreed on an area… (I’ve been stubborn about where I’m willing to live, but we want to have kids, and I want the best I can give them).
• Was breifly pregnant, maybe next time I’ll make it until I have a child. I guess I should have been more specific of my goal. Have a child. That’s the end goal here.
•Haven’t really been working on learning languages, haven’t had much time lately, but I hope to get this checked off sooner than later. I should have some time now that the boat is in the water… I have a little less to do because a lot of what I was busy doing was trying to get ready to get the boat in the water…
Next Dec. 23 I’d like my life to be different:
- more money at my job, whether this be through a promotion or just a raise, either way.
- better clothes! I want to look the way I WANT to look, not the way I do. I want to wear nice things, that present myself the way I want to be presented.
- lose weight! (for real this time, I hope). I’m planning on going gluten free for the month of Jan. to see if it will help me with any of my pain, and I’m hoping that it will also help me lose weight. If it helps with anything, I’m hoping I can keep it up in Feb. too. I’m also planning on going to the gym more. The problem with that is it’s a double edged sword with me. The gym makes my back hurt, but the only way to make my back better is the gym… sigh.
- Be a little gentler with myself. I am still hard on myself, and I need to be better about that.
- Buy a house. A home. Someplace that we love, that we can raise a family in. Somewhere that will feel like home to our future children.
- Get pregnant. Like seriously, this is on my mind all the time now. I guess it’s that clock people talk about all the time. Anyhow, once we get out of the in-laws house I hope to make this a reality.
- Learn portuguese! It’s been a goal of mine for a long time, but I finally found a free language app for my phone, and this could actually be a reality, I hope. A little bit every day, hopefully I’ll get there and by the end of the year, I’ll have a pretty good grasp on it.
So, It’s a little after Dec. 16. But Eh, I was busy??
Anyhow how did I do?
I think I did okay. We have some money in a savings account, I have a 401K now, so I have finally invested SOMETHING somewhere (and I’m getting 23% on my investments, thank you very much). I got a new position at my work, and I like it at least a little better than my last. (I actually don’t mind the work at all, and like that part quite a bit better than previously, however, I’m having some issues with the other girl I work with being a huge b… so there’s that. I really have been closer with my husband, and I have to make a real effort, but I’ve been better at helping around the house. I have not lost weight… and I guess I sort of gave up, but I’m hoping next year I can. Moneywise, beyond investing, we’re actually really well off for the time being. We found someone to rent our place and until we get a lump sum next year, we’re staying at his parents house and we’re pocketing half of the rent. It’s not easy, because I really have no business living with other adults, but, I know it will be worth it. I really didn’t do better with clothes AT ALL this year, but I think I’ll be better next year, especially now that I have more $ to spend on it, as well as uniforms for work, so I won’t ruin my clothes any more. Definitely made a few new friends this year, and they’re wonderful, so that’s a happy note. Things are looking up compared to last year, and I hope to keep that going.
- Started with taking over finances for our family. Why? Because we need transparency as a couple!
- Started my 401K and I’m happy with that and counting it as my investment for the year. I can borrow against it, and it’s adding up faster than I thought it would at 3%.
*My schedule is benefitting my goal to do more around the house …every other week. On my early weeks, I am able to help out, but on my late weeks, it’s late enough that I can’t do anything when I get home, but early enough that I can’t really get anything done before I leave. Such is life, I guess. Me and my husband need to work on things in general though, because I’d like to have children in the near future, but I just find that I am not sure that I want my kids raised the way he does. It could be a big problem… but we’re going to work through it.
*I’ve been actually wearing makeup and contacts to work, and starting to buy new clothes that I actually like. I have a ways to go, but I’m happy with the things I’ve bought in the last few weeks, and been getting rid of the things I don’t like any longer.
*Made a really great new friend. So, there’s that.
I’m doing really bad at losing weight. It’s been weighing on me lately. I have been in a lot of pain and can’t get to the gym despite the fact that I really want to. So, I’m focusing on my diet right now. I’ve started by allowing myself LESS fast food and I’m working towards NO fast food. That will be a start. Beyond that, I’m working on eating less gluten after lunch. I feel like I don’t need a ton of carbs right before bed, I have no reason to eat that much unless I’m planning on staying up all night and partying. I don’t, I have a bed time and it’s not late, so I don’t need the energy to last all night. My husband is putting a little bit of a fight up, but I pick meals he likes, and he’s not going to notice. I should have gone with my gut and just not told him, he never would have noticed we weren’t having gluten if I just had eliminated it on my own.
We’re working on the finances right now. We have been a little short on cash lately, but we’re saving some money, and we’re working towards our goals. We’re never so short we won’t make it through, and we have a little bit of money we can fall back on, so it’s not that huge of a deal, but we are slowly working towards saving money.
I’m not sure if I’ll be investing any money. BUT I have a 401K and so I think that counts towards this actually. I may not have any extra money right now, but I’m happy that I started this 401K.
We aren’t able to put our condo on the market right now because the people below us just foreclosed :(. SO, it’s up for rent. Hey, it’s not ideal, but we’ll be out and on our way to something good. We’re doing it through a realeastate agenecy… so they will do a credit cand background check first as well, which is good. AND they’ll take care of getting the deposit and should the person just LEAVE they’ll start trying to rent it out. Not to mention they’ll have the lease written up and it will hold up in court this way should anything happen.
I’m working on the clothing. I donated a TON of clothes this week. So, I’m getting rid of the things I don’t love. Now I just have to work on the buying things I love, things I want to be seen in.
I’ve been being a better wife. I really have been. Contributing to our marriage more. We had a big fight about him not including me in things and how that makes me feel like I don’t want to include my help in things and it is getting better. And he’s starting to actually understand that I’m really constantly in pain, and I’m not just saying that to get out of doing things, but because I’m in a lot of pain pretty much all the time. I’m working on the pain management, but until then, he is working with me now. And not rolling his eyes. And he is understanding that I can’t lift a lot of things but I will do dishes, and I’ll sweep the house, and make the bed. I’ll do what I can, but he has stopped trying to force me to do more than I can now.
I’ve been wearing my contacts, but I’m still working on the doing my hair thing. It’s just a lot of work that I don’t feel like doing usually so that I can get all dusty and dirty at work :). But I think I’ll get there. I’m getting better about so many things lately.
Started my new job, and I really like it so so much better than my last position… which I didn’t hate but I was glad to move on. It came with a raise, which is nice. I also finally started putting money in my 401K here, and they match some percentage of up to 3%.
We almost had our condo sold…but then the buyer couldn’t get financed. It was disapointing, but we have an idea of what it would sell for and we’re working towards putting it on the market right now.
Because of my new position, people aren’t around as much. It’s really really great. It’s a lot easier to not let people get under my skin when there isn’t really anyone there to get under my skin. I have been sooo much better about just being nice. Just nice to everyone I can be nice to. Working hard and it’s a new thing for me to have to actually work all day. I like it though, and get a sense of accomplishment when I know I’m doing more work than they thought I would.
I can’t even explain how many new friends I’ve made. It has always been hard for me to make new friends because it turns out people don’t like me. Or rather, they didn’t like me. But now, somehow I’ve become less awkward and people think I’m great—all of the sudden. I’m not sure why or how, but I’ll take it. Maybe it has something to do with me making an honest effort to always be genuine with everyone around me. Maybe it has something to do with being happy at work now, because when I’m unhappy at work, I’m less fun :). It doesn’t really make a difference why, people actually like me lately, and I’m just going to think it’s a good thing.
I’m stuck still at the weight I was in April, but it really HAS been changing diet wise. I’m now drinking one soda a day at most, so that’s a start I swear. I’m eating food from home at lunch and breakfast more often, and I can feel the plateau about to end. I can just feel it in the air.
I really think I’m becoming better every day. My life is getting better. I’m finding my way out of problems, I’m working towards something I’m doing something I don’t hate anymore. I am working with people who appreciate the work I put in and who appreciate me. :). Life is getting better little by little, day by day.
I am working harder on losing weight, going to the gym every other day, and I am starting to be more aware of what goes in my body…even though it’s sort of a tough truth to realize EVERYTHING has to change but it’s still a truth. It’s getting better, and I’m already notciing a difference and I am certain the weight will start to go down soon.
Talked to my OBGYN about starting a family, starting on prenatal vitamins and we’re looking at selling our condo so we’ll be in a permanent home eventually…sooner rather than later.
I have nicer pants and nicer clothes, and I’m working on this, but being that I AM losing weight, I don’t intend on buying a ton of clothes right now, because I won’t be in them forever.
I am still working on the not letting others bother me thing. I have started to come to terms more with the fact that I won’t see eye to eye with everyone. I can feel good about it usually though, as long as I was the best person I could be. I will continue to try to live like this… it feels good.
I actually have made a few new friends, and they’re great. Lovely people really, and I look forward to seeing them…and my husband likes them. It’s been nice and drama free lately.
I just got offered a new position at work, and so I’ll be moving over to a different job with different people. I’m really looking forward to it. It will be a LOT more work than what I’m currently doing, but I think that will be good. I can honestly say, I think it will be a great fit for me, and I look forward to when I can go over there.
I am working on being a better person still, but I think I am getting better every day. It’s sometimes hard to take a breath and realize that I’m getting dragged down by someone who is just unhappy and miserable. I am getting better at it though. I can usually find a reason to smile.
Well, I think that this is a different life than I had at this time last year. But I don’t know if it’s for the better. SO I’ll keep this goal up here again this year.
Next December 16th,
I’d like to be fit and thin. Happy with my body the weight it’s at, and the shape it’s in. Comfortable in clothes and able to wear the things I like to wear.
I’d like to be thinking about if not on our way to a family. Because I can’t wait forever for that, even if I would put it off a few more years if I could because I still want to have so much fun!
I’d like to be happy in my marriage. Obviously I won’t be happy at all times, but happier than sad. I’d like to make the changes I need to believe in my husband and have him believe in me the way that I need. I would like to make changes to be a more supportive wife. It’s not easy because I’m selfish… so I’m working on changing that. It’s a slow and go process, but I’m working at it.
I’d like to have a better wardrobe. Every year I want better clothes. Because I know how I want to look, and I’d love to look that way. I think a main part of this goal is losing weight. Because I think I’ll look better in the things I want to wear at the weight I want to be.
I want to be HEALTHY. I want to feel good. I obviously don’t mean never get a cold, but I want my heart not to hurt from stress and I want my body to feel good after running up stairs. I want to be in better shape physically and to start to sort out the things that are holding me down, like my allergies which I know I have because after nearly every meal my face turns bright red… I hope that doesn’t mean a gluten allergy because I am not really as ready to go gluten free as I’d hoped.
I want to get over the things that bother me about others. This includes my cousin whom I just no longer respect as a person. The problem is, now whenever I see her…everything she does bothers me. This is because even though I don’t respect her I care about her and so when she’s being stupid, I want to fix her. I can’t, and I need to let it go. I will be happier having let it go. I just need to learn how.
I want to make friends with more people who lift me up. I can’t believe that the friends I’ve made in the past few years are more like family to me than any of the friends I had before. I’ve gotten rid of so many people, and I always felt bad about it at first, because I felt I was not being fair to them. Not giving them the chance they deserved, but now that I have friends that are so wonderful, I can’t imagine why I kept people around who didn’t make me feel this way. I want more of that. And I want to continue to rid my life of the people who weigh it down. I find, my new friends are more like family to me than my family at times, and I can trust them more than I’ve trusted my friends in the past, and I just know this is how it’s supposed to be. So, now I have a bench mark, and I hope I can find more people to be around that get me and don’t expect me to be something I’m not or fit into some mold.
I hope to find something more meaningful to do, perhaps where I’m at now, or maybe somewhere else. But something I can be proud of. Something that allows me to grow professionally and use all the skills I know I have. Something I can smile about doing. Something I like to go to work and do every single day. (okay, if people enjoyed work EVERY single day, we wouldn’t get paid to do it…but still… at least most days).
I want to rise above things. Because I want to be that good person I know I am deep inside. I want to be the good person that people know is so good there’s just no possible way she did something bad, it’s just not believable. I want to be kinder to those around me, I want to be kinder to myself, and I want to do the right thing…every time.
I’ve lost a few more pounds, (at least an inch this month in my waist and hips!) and it’s a work in progress. I know I can do it, just have to keep working towards that goal.
I’ve been cleaning my mothers house weekly and brinigng home $20 in cash that I’ve been able to hide away. :). It’s not much yet because I just started but it will add up quickly enough :):).
Still showing up with wet hair. I hate drying my hair. I DO put my outfits out the night before so that’s a start. I got up 20 minutes earlier the other day and I LOVED IT. I can’t believe how much I get done in 20 minutes!
I’ve not been better as a wife. I can honestly say I feel bad for my husband lately. LOL. I’ve been feeling rather sorry for myself for all of my medical problems lately and just unattractive and gross and this isn’t his fault, but he gets the brunt of the problems because I’m not wanting to show affection or be close… It really is something I have to work on. Consciously. I’ve been focused on myself and I need to find a way to focus on me AND him. I know he isn’t leaving but I don’t want to give him any reasons to want to. That’s not fair to him.
Beth has gotten 25 cheers on this goal.
- Lana cheered this 6 months ago
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